Everything was cool until I graduated college and then I just failed to amount to anything. In college i was partying every weekend and racked up an n-count of 50. i got a worthless degree and couldn't get a dignified job. the sense of a failure and self-loathing caused me to isolate myself and i alienated all my friends. I managed to pay off 40k of student loans in under 4 years, but it was with two shitty retail jobs. I saved up some money and went to Thailand for 6 months and just drank and fucked hookers everyday. I don't regret it, but i still feel this anguish because it was never real. The fact that i was young or good looking didn't mean anything. None of those girls i fucked cared about me, thought i was worth anything more than some fat old guy. I was just another customer. I'm 28 btw.

I saw/met the guys who ran the beer bars/gogo bars. I saw how they'd get hundreds of likes on their status updates, how many people knew them, how much social influence they appeared to have. How much attention they got. I have none of that. I have nothing. I have no power over other people, what i want/say/do means nothing to anybody. I might as well be invisible. I'm a good looking guy, in-shape, and I'm not a perma-virgin but i just can. not. stand. having. zero. power.

How do normal people get power? Are there any good books to read? (inb4 48 laws of power)