So, she's been my plate for 5-6 months in the first year of college, didn't want a relationship, entered a relationship with her after six other plates that weren't good as my current gf.

She was a virgin, and a good housewife too. Even before we entered a relationship she used to come to my apartment to cook, clean, do my laundry and etc. (We are both from a different town, but we both have separate apartments so we don't live together). We are now 17 months into the relationship, things are great. I always maintained my frame without giving in, ever.

Anyway, it's this summer time that I hate the most, she was on vacation three times this summer, combining it all it sums up to whole month her having a good time without me. I'm working so I couldn't come to her, but she didn't invite me either because her parents are not really fond of neither her of her sister being in a relationship until they both finish the college. She travelled twice to my town and stayed for the night because I made sure several times she understands that I won't be in a relationship in which we won't be seeing each other whole summer. She plans to come again next week for four days, I replied that I don't know if that's a good idea since I have my finals coming up soon.

THE PROBLEM: Maybe I'm a hypocrite but I hate the fact that she's having a great time without me, that she's having GNO's or at least going out three times per week on average. She texts and calls for some reason whenever she's out, I never text or call her during those nights. On average she comes home between 1PM and 4PM when she's out.

In the beginning, I struggled with the fact of summer vacation (without her really knowing) that I even wrote a post here like two or three weeks ago. She shows no signs of cheating or any kind of change in behaviour that could indicate that something is going on but nevertheless it's not the way I want to have a relationship.

I'm considering telling her I'm breaking up with her and she's free to do whatever she wants because this is simply not something I desire in a relationship. Also, the relationship is so good I think that if I was single again I would again be a better man, I'm lifting currently and maintaining my looks and my mind but more aggressively and more often since she's gone. Also, I study for my finals with more will and determination. Moreover, there's a selfish reason: other women who know that my girlfriend is away want to hang out with me, and I do hang out with them occasionally carefully so I'm not crossing the line of cheating but I'm always flirting and throwing sexual innuendos because It's a hell of a fun for me, I love playing this games with other girls and it feels like a dance.

Maybe not important, but my girlfriend is aware of my social value and other girls; I'm active in my town's political party and hang out with some real upstand folks, I know and have many connections even though I'm 22. Many of my friends are not friends, 95% of them are actually guys who either envy me or want to see my downfall. Because of my work, I know a lot of people in power in my town, they treat me with meals, drinks or tennis matches on their playgrounds so I got the SMV in check.

Usually, we spend the whole year together, she doesn't go out without me and we work great as a couple, I can't honestly remember one thing that I hate about her it's simply this summer time when we're away. I don't care if this sounds like I'm insecure beta dick sucker or whatever, it's simply something that I don't PREFER and I would rather quit it. Not only I'll have less on my mind I'll also be again "in the game", I'll have to push my limits of looks and knowledge to pursue other women, to pursue my goals with more enthusiasm and stamina which I obviously lack.

TLDR: Current girlfriend is away on vacation for a month, I don't like it. I feel like she's slowing me down both mentally and dragging me from achieving my goals because I'm SIMPLY TO COMFORTABLE in this relationship.