I am 168cm with small hands and feminine facial features. I was invisible to women before started lifting and having 15 inch biceps and growing a beard. I've been told by women that I am good looking but not attractive, and how they wished that I was 6ft.

I don't care about my size most of the time, but sometimes I feel like I don't belong to my body, I was supposed to be in a frame of 6'2 wide shouldered man with manly facial features. These are feelings, and I can't just stop feeling them at my own will. These feelings suffocate me and make me miserable.

I do a lot of self-improvement and its great. I used to be the bottom 2% in any social group, now I am somewhere in top who can get a LTR and not be invisible in social settings. But, there would be a voice inside me that says that I don't belong here, and I am supposed to be doing a low paying job that are not complex, and instead of getting sex from a gf I am supposed to be a bitch of some big dude. If you will ever meet me, you will never think that these thoughts can cross my mind, because I seem very confident and outgoing and ambitious.

Everyone judges a person about his status through how he appears. And no matter how much I lift and improve and become confident, if would be put next to a tall or even average guy, both men and women will find me less respectable and desirable.

I can live with being unattractive, but I cannot live with the feelings of being unattractive. If it makes any sense