Is she cheating?

tenxs · 2017-11-26T13:52:23+00:00

What you need to understand and have to accept is that you'll probably never find out if your SO cheated. We won't either. You can only gather hints, like guarding her phone 24/7. Also, if she wants to fuck other men, she will find a way to fuck other men. You can't control her. You cannot.

The fact you're obsessing over the possibility proofs nothing except your insecurity. Also, if you let that insecurity spill outwards in any form (e.g. jealousy), you'll be single in no time.

Here is what you actually can do. Fix your life, you mention you're not in the greates place currently. Work on your own problems, the insecurities and forget about your SO for now. Pull back emotionally and remind yourself it's only your turn with her.

You obviously don't trust her that much. That's a legit reason to end it and get rid of the constant negitivity. My stance is, if you have the urge to snoop through her phone, you're better off leaving her, but that's up to you. Your call.

MattyAnon · 2017-11-26T15:01:59+00:00

Does constantly thinking that a SO cheated on you mean that you should trust those thoughts and end it right there?

No.

Thing is.... men have a knack for knowing if a woman is cheating. But it's not foolproof, and often our paranoia causes these feelings.

are obsessive thoughts and gut feeling the same?

No.

Could be wrong but I could be right..

What are the indications that make you think she is cheating?

Another thing to seriously think about: most women WILL cheat sooner or later, this is their nature. How can you insulate yourself from the impact of this? How can you live your life so that her cheating doesn't matter that much to you?

Answers may include "get other options".

coldbloodednuts · 2017-11-26T13:20:52+00:00

I don't think it takes Sherlock Holmes to figure it out. Is she secretive? Is she gone for hours at a time and she doesn't tell you where she is? Does she guard her cell phone to make sure you don't see it? Do her eyes light up and her arms open up when you approach her? Jealousy will kill a relationship real fast. You need to figure it out.

atticusfinch1973 · 2017-11-26T14:44:29+00:00

The simple fact that you would care if she did means you still have work to do.

Retspihi · 2017-11-26T14:21:14+00:00

I think it means it’s time to end the relationship and improve yourself.

zboo1h · 2017-11-26T18:15:50+00:00

If it's such an issue that you post it on Reddit, then it really doesn't matter if she is or isn't.

raisins3142 · 2017-11-27T00:21:28+00:00

If it is just a random feeling and encroaching thought you can't shake, but when you think on it you have no actual reason to think that, then yeah it might be you.

When I would tell someone to trust their gut, it is when your gut is pinging for a reason. Let's say you catch a girl in what seems like a white lie, but the reason for the lie could very likely be her cheating, and you get a weird feeling and think she is acting funny...well that is a horse of a different color, for example.

Here's another reason that you might be having these thoughts: the girl has not done anything really shady but also has not done normal things that people do to build trust in a relationship. The lack of what is typical behavior (being transparent to build trust) can slowly make you suspicious.

tacko276 · 2017-11-27T16:49:48+00:00

I'm going to say this in the nicest way possible You are acting like an insecure little bitch. You literally have every fucking thing backwards She should be the one worrying about you cheating. You have a shit ton of work to do my friend Stop wasting your time worrying about what she's doing and worry about what you are doing Get your shit together Up your dread game Get a fucking life outside of your ltr And for fuck sake go lift

Title	Is she cheating?
Author	Johnnythesinna
Upvotes	11
Comments	12
Date	November 26, 2017 1:16 PM UTC (8 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/askTRP
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/asktrp/comments/7fmu0p/is_she_cheating/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/askTRP/is-she-cheating.118985 https://theredarchive.com/post/118985

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