Looking for escalation guide

noobish_senpai · 2019-09-19T12:31:56+00:00

I dont have much experience but so far the only real thing I could find about escalation is through trial and error. As far as I understand you need to fail countless times to really unlock the possibilities.

MultiMidsets · 2019-09-19T12:18:03+00:00

Same

deathhandmachiavelli · 2019-09-19T13:01:14+00:00

I am thinking of some examples of how I have escalated and don't really have a guide.

Some are lame AF but these are some real life examples, some of them are rookie, some are embarrassing, some worked better than others. What I observed AFTER writing them, is that there is no guide (for me anyways), you just go for it and it happens. You usually feel it. I tried to force it a couple times, but it sometimes works out at the end.

Example 1: I'm trying to get with this girl, she says she only wants to be friends. Anyways, we end up going swimming together, as friends, while in the pool, we are laughing, joking around, talking. We end up rubbing our bodies close to each other, I let my leg touch her leg. All of a sudden she nibbles on my shoulder and then just lifts her head up and we start kissing.

Example 2: I knew a girl liked me because I had been told. We're at a party. So I waited a while, just started talking to her, could sense the attraction, so I took her hand, and I could feel the desire how we looked at each other, so I just kissed her. No verbal escalation, no real teasing. Just the tension and attraction that we could both see.

Example 3: At a party, I invited a girl in my class I just told her she should show up to the party. I got a moment alone with her outside, I could tell she was feeling it, no verbal escalation, no teasing, we just both were attracted to each other and it was there, so I moved in to kiss her and it all progressed from there.

Example 4: I had a girl in my class - the tension was thick between us, she would throw hints my way. After the last day of class I just called her and asked her if she wants to do something with me, she said yes, I already had the time and place, it was a hotel. I straight up asked her if she was going to look hot for me, she said yes. She called me to let me know she was at the hotel, as soon as she walked in, we started kissing. My only verbal escalation was over the phone and the call literally lasted 4 minutes.

Example 5: Took a girl to a movie, after the movie took her by the hand, we walked together, she gave me a lecture about how only couples take each other by the hand and we weren't there yet. We both met at the movie theater, so I told her okay, and started to tell her that I'll see her later then (I thought I failed). She grabbed me by the hand and asked if I did want to be her boyfriend, I said yes and we kissed (I know this sounds lame AF, but that's how it happened, lol).

Example 6: Took another girl to a movie, and at the end of the movie, I tried to kiss her, she pulled her face away. We went outside of the theater together and started talking, after a few minutes, she got close to me, started initiating contact herself, took me by the hand we were looking at each other and just started kissing.

Example 7: At a party, looking at a hot girl. I say "watch this" to my friend and go up to her and ask her her name, I say something stupid "you're kind of cute" (I know, sounds dumb) and just start kissing her, it progresses from there.

Example 8: Epic failure. My friend tells me a girl likes me and I need to try with her. We are sitting next to each other in the back seat of his SUV, we had been dancing with each other a little earlier. I try to kiss her, she turns her head away. Flat out rejection. I wasn't really feeling it, I went with what my friend said and it was a flop.

Example 9: Showed up at a girl's work that I liked and talked to her for a little while, asked what time she gets out of work, she asked why, I told I was going somewhere that maybe she could go, she says yes - it was an activity - I won't say what. While we are over there we are both real close to each other, just naturally wanting to be close to each other, making physical contact. After we're done I take her back to her work, on the way over she just says "kiss me" and we're making out why I drive her back.

Got tons more - it seems like I never follow a science.

Maybe a lot of people do, you just get to the point that she wants to kiss you and you can tell. You just act on it. I have my two movie theater experiences that I tried to force it, they both ended up working out.

I have the example of relying on what my friend said and it failed miserably.

Maybe some people have a science, I just interact and when I see that its working and the energy is there, I just escalate and it works most of the time.

Rx_Red · 2019-09-19T12:50:36+00:00

Google "DiCarlo Escalation Ladder: Concise and Emphasized" and click the Reddit link for it

Title	Looking for escalation guide
Author	mrkinix
Upvotes	0
Comments	6
Date	September 19, 2019 12:07 PM UTC (6 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/askTRP
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/asktrp/comments/d6d3bg/looking_for_escalation_guide/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/askTRP/looking-for-escalation-guide.254061 https://theredarchive.com/post/254061

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