LTR ended it. Where did I go wrong?

Praeda18 · 2020-09-02T04:47:16+00:00

another guy?

Yep. See: branch swinging.

failing comfort tests?

Nope. You didn’t capitulate to her made up bullshit & give her everything she (thinks she) wants.

Sounds like your girl is neurotic as fuck, demanding you to act in a certain manner to appease whatever mental shit she has going on. Dodged a bullet, mate.

Musicgoon · 2020-09-02T02:45:28+00:00

Never go beta. She was going to branch swing and assigned the blame to you. Move on. I guarantee she already has.

BlocknGhost · 2020-09-02T03:30:46+00:00

Sounds like she took control of the relationship by getting you to step up to her demands and pulling you into her frame, then lost interest and jumped ship once you did.

It’s hard not to get hung up on it when these types of things happen, but you shouldn’t want to be with someone who doesn’t want to make it work with you. Self improvement time. Talk to other women regardless, don’t hook up if you don’t feel like it yet, but don’t sit home alone with your thoughts. Purpose, gym, diet, find another income stream, branch out socially. Cut off all communication with her ASAP.

SmartAdhesiveness · 2020-09-02T03:13:20+00:00

You’ve been dating for a year, and she says you don’t take her around your parents.

Maybe she wanted to know if you were into marrying her?

IXseed · 2020-09-02T03:16:33+00:00

You were pretty much done. How far along did you become official since you were only together for a year?

W_O_M_B_A_T · 2020-09-02T12:25:51+00:00

feels like I dont are about her feelings

"Right now? Not going to lie I'm a little bored. What's this really about?"

I thought the right thing to do at the time was to go beta and assure her everything was fine,

Deal with comfort tests by showing leadership.

tell her how much im into her

That's crap.

You cannot tell anyone that you're into them. You can either act like you're into them, or else don't.

If you're not giving enough affirmation, that is not rewarding valuable behavior enough, then look back, recognize, and then fix it.

Fast forward to today everything was fine in the mean time but now I get a amplified version of her saying that I'm not doing enough for her and what not and I should just be doing it without her asking.

"I have a lot of talents but telepathy isn't one of them. You want something, you've got to tell the guy at the counter that's what you want."

Didn't really fight for her this time and just told her I am who I am and if she feels that way we should end it.

Good on you. Replacing a woman is doable. Replacing your pride and dignity is harder.

Another guy in the picture?

That's Likely. She was looking to swing branches. She wouldn't have escalated and then tossed a bunch of bullshit at you otherwise, basically forcing an argument. If not you'd have had to do some more egregious crap than "not paying attention to her feelings."

SmokedGoy336 · 2020-09-02T14:21:04+00:00

I don’t think you did anything wrong. Sometimes you have to go softer after a while when they demand comfort. As long as its not full beta. It sounds like her excuse is that you weren’t being beta enough, not enough comfort. Really, she’s just insecure and needy. Anyways, there’s most likely another guy.

Title	LTR ended it. Where did I go wrong?
Author	poopkopa
Upvotes	3
Comments	10
Date	September 2, 2020 2:26 AM UTC (5 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/askTRP
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/asktrp/comments/ikyc9u/ltr_ended_it_where_did_i_go_wrong/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/askTRP/ltr-ended-it-where-did-i-go-wrong.211655 https://theredarchive.com/post/211655

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