Pat down

inspiron3000 · 2016-12-22T12:28:08+00:00

GPS monitoring and pat downs are unacceptable.
Either she trusts you or she doesn't.

If she can't trust that you regret cheating and won't repeat that, then the relationship is going nowhere.

rpisnotpua · 2016-12-23T06:29:21+00:00

Decide what your goals are. For example, keep the marriage or keep a plate?

Then decide what you're willing to sacrifice to achieve that goal.

I don't get your boundaries. You cheat on your wife (A). You agree to be prevented from future cheating (B). You apologize for GPS failing (B). You have a good reason (A). Your wife asks permission to pat you down (not strip searched?) (double A). You don't want to be searched (A). You come here, apparently quite confused (B).

If you really only want her and no one else, suggest a strip search.

wallpunchist · 2016-12-22T07:50:16+00:00

What the hell do I do?

First you think INTENSIVELY about what is your moral code. Is cheating wrong? Obviously, because it's "breaking the relationship's contract". Unless you're the kind of person who thinks he's entitled and his wife is supposed to be terrorized and submissive. But is extramarital sex cheating for you? Is it not? Is it something else? Is lying to your "loved one" okay?

Secondly you start following your fucking moral code. To the point. You expect your wife to stuff it and stfu when you cheat? You hold on to this frame. She's mad? You tell her to STFU or GTFO.

Thirdly what do you do in your current situation? You answer yourself after answering previous two.

lietruth · 2016-12-22T07:51:37+00:00

This is tough. Firstly, she doesn't trust you. If you want the marriage to last you'll need to build up trust again. The way I see it you have two options here.

You build up trust again with her. This will take time. & an immense amount of frame from you. Shit test after shit test. Comfort comfort comfort. A storm will rage. GPS's will be installed (without you knowing). Monitoring will happen.
You get your finances & shit together & then end it peacefully framing it with the benefit being on her side.

How I see it, is any relationship that's come to a point where you have to GPS track the person, isn't one that's going to last.

LordThunderbolt · 2016-12-23T07:01:58+00:00

You'd make a good dog.

W_O_M_B_A_T · 2016-12-24T05:02:48+00:00

You showed terminal weakness and failure by being complacent and getting caught. Now you're paying for that weakness. If you're going to live a double life, you better be able to hack it, and you'd better be willing to accept the potential losses.

If getting divorced simply isn't an option, demand an open relationship.

Strongproudwoman · 2016-12-22T07:46:38+00:00

I'd cut and run. I don't fully know you situation but if you are already thinking of leaving might as well go for a Hail Mary and tell her to eat shit and you'll pat her down.

Title	Pat down
Author	Deckard_Spade
Upvotes	1
Comments	16
Date	December 22, 2016 7:29 AM UTC (9 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/askTRP
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/asktrp/comments/5jpcby/pat_down/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/askTRP/pat-down.79525 https://theredarchive.com/post/79525

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