Problem holding frame when girlfriend doesn 't put out

GayLubeOil · 2015-07-10T22:19:51+00:00

This is a symptom of a much larger problem she isnt that attracted to you. There is no fast tip we can give you to solve thid issue. Women fuck dudes they are attracted to you. Maybe your not in shape. Maybe you dont convay masculinity. It could be a lot of things. But at this point if this is an ongoing thing she is saving her eggs for better sperm.

scarfofpirate · 2015-07-11T00:29:41+00:00

'She lets me fuck her'.
Oh what an absolute honour. What a glorious privilege. I hope she also lets you buy her dinner, or even lets you clean her toilet. Jokes aside, you're fucking right for waking up to this shit. It's clear in your post that you know this already:

YOU are the prize.

She should be enthusiastic to even just be in your presence. You're angry because she got her side of the relationship (comfort, cuddling, security) but bailed on your side (the sex).
You don't need this shit in your life.
You have two options:

Break it off, keep smashing the gym and working on yourself.
Make your time and resources more valuable and scarce. For example, you just gave her your evening (your time) after working all day and got nothing in return. She didn't even need to put out because you handed everything she wanted right over to her. Make yourself more busy with your own shit (gym, work, hobbies, friends). Make her less of a priority. She's got to work for your time. If she doesn't give you good sex why are you even dating her? This doesn't mean go no contact. When you talk, turn things more sexual. Make it clear this is a sexual relationship. Create the sexual vibe. She's a woman, if she's feeling sexual she'll know what to do. If she doesn't reciprocate the same sexual vibe or avoids it entirely then she is just using you. She's getting the benefit of a boyfriend without being a girlfriend. You're basically her best friend (that's not a good thing, btw). This is where you dump her and move on. You're better off committing your time with someone new then trying to change her entire perception of you.

dr_warlock · 2015-07-10T22:17:11+00:00

I know what this means and I am just sick of that. Just want to get up and leave and use my weekend for working out instead of dealing with this shit.

Do it. Your instincts were right. Then she's gonna say something like,"you've been so distant lately. Is there something wrong?" Ignore that. Say: "Nothing."

Cuddling comes after sex. Don't kill the sexual tension with comfort before it even starts.

abdada · 2015-07-10T22:16:09+00:00

How often does this happen? Once a year? Once a month? Once a week?

naworc · 2015-07-10T22:41:08+00:00

Don't let her know that she is not putting out as much as you want. If you do this all she has to do is tolerate fucking you more often for a couple weeks just to keep you around. Then you will be right back to square one.

You should leave at the very least to clear your head for the weekend. As you said she will start asking questions. Be very vague with your answers. Her hamster is your #1 friend in this battle for her sex drive. If you give her BS answers the hamster will usually automatically fill in the blanks with the worst case scenario in her mind. This will create some dread and we all know what that does.

Sepean · 2015-07-10T22:54:05+00:00

You can dump her as you say, but the problem is most likely you. You are acting too beta, and you will do that again in your next relationship. I say stay and fix it, if nothing else for the practice.

You need to be more alpha. Lift. Don't do small favors for her. Pass her shit tests. She gives sex, then you give affection. No sex, no affection; you never go first. Play dread games - go out with mates, chat up girls. If you're lazy and boring, playing xbox all day or something like that, stop it and do something productive.

I had all the external trappings of an alpha but I acted like a beta with my wife and that got me dead bedroomed for half a decade. Then I found the red pill and she turned into a horny little sexkitten. You need to develop the skill set, if not with this girl then the next or you'll keep ending up in the same situation.

CuntyMcFagNuts69 · 2015-07-10T22:59:11+00:00

It's so easy but hard. DREAD GAME. I was getting overweight for along time. We had sex maybe once every 2 weeks. Then I bought new undies, got new cologne, spent about 500 on clothes, cleaned my truck, started hitting the gym 8 times a week. Hitting on the cute waitress definitely helps. If your girl is too comfortable and has you on lock down, why would she want to impress you??

She never ever ever initiated sex (pre TRP), now she initiates at least twice a week

SexistFlyingPig · 2015-07-10T23:34:06+00:00

"Just want to get up and leave..."

That's a good idea.

"where's the fun when she's not enthusiastic..."

Yep, leave tomorrow.

She's not the only one who thinks you're hot, so you need to up your level of dread so that she realizes that you ARE someone she wants to work for.

Why buy the cow when the milk is free? Why should she have to put any effort into sex if you'll give her all the attention and validation she needs?

krustytheclown2 · 2015-07-11T02:06:32+00:00

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Title	Problem holding frame when girlfriend doesn 't put out
Author	[deleted]
Upvotes	5
Comments	31
Date	July 10, 2015 10:10 PM UTC (11 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/askTRP
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/asktrp/comments/3cukky/problem_holding_frame_when_girlfriend_doesn_t_put/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/askTRP/problem-holding-frame-when-girlfriend-doesn-t-put.189797 https://theredarchive.com/post/189797

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