Red flag or a normal relationship?

DonaldBaelish · 2017-01-18T16:15:43+00:00

There was no need for a full , logical , adult conversation. You could have played it with "I want to delay the weddig. I need some time to think" and then let her go all emotional on you. Don't be phased. Keep reading.

Women are emotional creatures and if you are going to in fact have the wedding now or in a year you need to start heading off to the MRP sub because there is slight difference between the vast amount of theory only applicable for plates and the theory for LTRs and marriages. Something vital , you need to know your girl.

One example for testing how your marriage will look like is to hand your wife a prenup. You understand what a red flag it would be if she suddenly starts accusing you of not loving her and what not , tearing the agreement up. If you still want to marry her just answer her batshitcraziness with "In case it does not work out". You can smell the dread from kilometers. I'm not from the states and prenups do have power where I'm at.

It is in the female nature to manipulate. She might just be manipulating you into thinking that she is a great wife and lover. Don't be surprised if she starts banging you every day , which she should but how would you find TRP? It may be so subtle , just like she "offered" to make you dinner like she is not supposed to cook anyways. But it is not possible to guess how long this will last or will it end after you eventually marry.

You need to screen her. You need to lead. You need to be the patriarch.

TitsAndWhiskey · 2017-01-18T19:44:26+00:00

Don't get married. Women are like a dog chasing a car. They have no idea what to do with it once they catch it.

Marry this girl and you will pay for it.

MattyAnon · 2017-01-18T17:13:50+00:00

she found this devastating / cant keep her hands off me

Her uncertainty and emotional torment directly translates into your physical satisfaction.

Well done, you're the prize again.

You can take this as an indication of how she'll be when she's got your full legally backed commitment.

The present state of affairs won't last forever - she'll soon try to force marriage, get pregnant, or leave you for another potential provider.

A part of me thinks that this is pretty normal.

Normal as in AWALT, yes.

she is being "good" again because she needs to prove herself. Which of course, this will eventually go away. Red flag perhaps?

It's not a red flag, she's fine to date.

But if you marry her - well, you know what's going to happen. Marriage doesn't "lock her in", it locks you in. And makes her complacent again.

Count yourself lucky that you've been warned like this. Don't listen to her words, look at her actions.

Bambam22bam · 2017-01-18T15:55:56+00:00

Well, don't get married anytime soon and You'll find out. If she isn't worth it, she'll show her hand eventually.

WhorehouseVet · 2017-01-18T20:31:05+00:00

Briffault's laws. She's all lovey dovey is because she is manipulating you to go ahead with the wedding, to demonstrate what she "could" be. But once she goes through the wedding, you can bet your nuts that she won't continue with the charade.

bsutansalt · 2017-01-19T11:01:42+00:00

But OVERNIGHT, she went from a "meh" fiance to a loving, caring, complimenting one, offering to make me dinner, tells me she loves me every 10 minutes, cant keep her hands off me.

You just experienced the power of dread. More reason not to get married, you'll never have this kind of power (of keeping her on her toes) once you get married.

Marriage worked in a bygone era where the cock carousel and divorce and prizes weren't readily available. nowadays, you're a damn fool for getting married and having kids unless you truly do have yourself a unicorn and/or a legit traditional relationship that follows something along the captain/first officer model.

FvckYourSafeSpace · 2017-01-18T17:31:21+00:00

normal. now think what will happen after years if you don't keep up with this bullshit.

DylanNails · 2017-01-18T17:57:24+00:00

Shes desperate for u to be her beta provider. Does she have a good job

BestSC86 · 2017-01-18T19:54:47+00:00

"Of course, she found this devastating and took it as I was attacking her and was extremely emotional. Fuck me for wanting to have an adult, logical conversation, right?"

Bhahahahahaaa.....imagine that, you told your female fiance that you want to delay the marriage and she took it emotionally.

What exactly did you think would happen? I think your answer to this simple question and your apparent, complete shock that she started being nicer to you are red flags that YOU are no where near ready for marriage.

You don't seem to understand women at all and likely will end up in a crappy marriage which ends in a few years either with her\you cheating and moving on.

failingtheturingtest · 2017-01-19T01:02:40+00:00

This is dread at work. It's not just her manipulating you into marriage. It's the constant battle that should happen for her to maintain your attention. She was at risk of losing it, and so she upped her game.

What you did was pretty hard dread. And it paid off. You need to practice light dread more regularly in the future to maintain this state of affairs.

Having read a lot of MRP and posts from Married Red Pillers here, getting married is not signing away sex and getting commitment in return.
Getting married and assuming you don't have to keep working on yourself, keeping abundance mentality and be prepared to dread to maintain her attraction is what will lead to you both being complacent, and her dreaming of someone who excites her. (and maybe finding them).

Keep the dread, screen some more.

Title	Red flag or a normal relationship?
Author	[deleted]
Upvotes	0
Comments	28
Date	January 18, 2017 3:52 PM UTC (9 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/askTRP
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/asktrp/comments/5oq3qx/red_flag_or_a_normal_relationship/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/askTRP/red-flag-or-a-normal-relationship.181994 https://theredarchive.com/post/181994

Comments