Im 31 and I'm recently rejoining the dating pool. I've been using dating sites with a little success, but this feels like the cowards way out. The good news is that once I'm on a date, things nearly always go well. I'm confident, interesting, have high SMV that I'm able to display without coming across as bragging, etc. I have two plates that I've secured from using OKC and Tinder.

I've declared 2015 the year of facing all of my fears and one of the biggest for me is approach anxiety. In nearly all of the dates I've gone on from dating sites, I get an overwhelming feeling that the girl is disappointed by the way I look when they first meet me. Luckily, after 5-10 minutes of conversation I'm able to display my high SMV and it's fairly smooth sailing from there. (On a side note, I was at a networking event earlier this week and there were two attractive females at my table who looked at me briefly when i sat down and quickly looked away. But after 15 minutes of me talking to one of the other guys they were both giving me "fuck you" eyes.)

So basically, my problem must be in some sort of mindset or the way i carry myself because while I'm not brad pitt - I'm not ugly.

Anyway...facing my fears. My biggest fear right now is approach anxiety. In all of NOV and DEC of last year I made about 5 approaches and every one ended horribly. Not just politely saying no, but HORRIBLE. Like the girl claimed to not speak english, would say nothing and turn away or (in 2-3 of the cases) make a weird face as if saying "how dare you think you're good enough to talk to me." Zero conversation.

But, it's a numbers game so i decided last night to go out to a club (not my normal venue) and force myself to do at least 5 approaches. And...5 more complete bombs. Zero conversation and often rude responses. I was with a friend who, objectively, i think many would say is slightly less attractive than me, and he fucking killed it by talking to a dozen girls and getting several numbers.

This must be a mindset thing right? I'm starting to feel like "just keep approaching" isn't a good strategy if I don't even get past the initial stages of conversation. Thoughts?