TRP, how has baggage affected your relationship?

RPstudent · 2013-09-23T19:33:25+00:00

Let me put this to you, why is a baggage-laden girl who recently bailed from the carousel relationship material? I don't care how hot or "calm" she may be, if the baggage is frustrating you, move on.

[deleted] · 2013-09-23T17:23:44+00:00

I guess I ignored it and let her work it out. Probing at it doesn't help because she'll just go into defensive mode.

If she isn't providing your needs, let her know. If she doesn't change, dump her.

qualia00 · 2013-09-24T07:13:06+00:00

In my experience, when a woman carries baggage she will make you pay for past transgressions which you had no part of. This is one of the primary red flags you should avoid because no amount of appeasement will help if she doesn't try to fix her problems on her own. You will inevitably run into wall after wall of something that she feels you are reminding her of, and time after time you'll have to reassure her that you aren't doing those things.

TL;DR - I dumped her after I couldn't take it anymore.

[deleted] · 2013-09-23T21:03:06+00:00

Baggage is inside the black box. It's not your problem, it's her problem.

Either her behavior is acceptable and your interactions with her add net positive value to her life, or not. If she can fit herself into life that you want to live, great; otherwise, find someone who can.

Old_Pine_Tree · 2013-09-23T21:06:20+00:00

Excluding a legit mental illness, how much baggage a women has depends on how much you are willing to let into the relationship. It really is that simple.

[deleted] · 2013-09-24T00:31:38+00:00

I made her remove said baggage from her contacts list and Facebook. New email and phone number, blocked a few of the problem cases on other social media. I run dread game subtly.

Justus222 · 2013-09-26T18:23:17+00:00

OP here. Thanks ya'll. I think it's just not meant to be. It's difficult, but after talking about our past history, there is just too many variables for me to commit. I am only in a relationship for marriage/a family as the goal, and I don't think she's fully healed from her past. Thanks.

Title	TRP, how has baggage affected your relationship?
Author	Justus222
Upvotes	8
Comments	7
Date	September 23, 2013 5:16 PM UTC (12 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/askTRP
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/asktrp/comments/1myy1i/trp_how_has_baggage_affected_your_relationship/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/askTRP/trp-how-has-baggage-affected-your-relationship.138343 https://theredarchive.com/post/138343

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