Here is my backstory: http://www.reddit.com/r/relationship_advice/comments/1ry9kz/please_help_understand_and_save_40m_my_marriage/

(Thanks very much to the kind person who pointed me to TRP after reading my post. Changed my life.)

She has been seeing a counselor, and is making small signs of improvement: talking to me more, kissing me once in a while, but still no sex, and it seems to be very up and down. really nice one day, doesn't want to look at me the next. I have been diligently studying TRP and reading (No More Mr. Nice Guy, Married Man Sex Life, Game, Blogs, etc). I am starting to rebuild my frame of dominance, and I believe that is what is cause my wife to respond a little. But the no sex thing is still killing the relationship.

She told me the other day that she "doesn't respect me" and "no matter how nice I've been, just my presence makes her feel negative". I blew up and told her to fuck off and many other things. And of course she came around later than night more passionately than she has in a long time.

It's very hard to play Dread game, because every bar we go to is mostly fat old bags. We kinda live in the sticks. I flirt with her friends as much as I can.

Do I throw down an ultimatum? Do I continue working on my frame and rebuild from there? Am I not grasping the method of Dread Game?

If I throw down an ultimatum, how long do I give the relationship to get fixed?

Thanks!