I don't want to submit to their frame and have the sub context of "please dont feel bad towards me, i want you to accept me" which "im sorry carries".

However every now and then I might do something i feel warrants appology. or that I am not comfortable with having done. we all go over the top.

so with one plate, we were talking and then It got heated when I mentioned a particular event. I tried to brush it off in funny way, but she really pushed it. Eventually i made a comment that completely invalidated her feelings probably because I was being so blunt.

So later i said something like "I don't like ever being rude to anyone unintentionally, which i was without realising. It was fine to ask that question, and if you still want me to clarify, you can ask".

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Is that still holding frame?

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