Any advice?

Murfdigidy · 2019-04-10T00:15:54+00:00

Attraction isn't an age it's a mind frame. First stop with the self deprecating attitude and realize you have no idea what it's going to be. Girls will attract to guys based on many factors and not all factors you bring to the table will be them, so make up for it in other ways. Confidence confidence confidence will get you laid more than age, good looks, money. Sure all those help, but nothing helps more than confidence

recyclablebanthas · 2019-04-10T02:52:21+00:00

1

Over the last year I have been doing a lot of self improvement

What have you done?

This is an important piece of the puzzle so glossing over it like this leaves out too much information. You want to know how to move forward, but haven't told us where you are now.

2

.....but I still look really young for my age so most females that are my age or the ones that are a little bit older aren’t going to just find me attractive.

You're joking, right? Aging well is usually considered a good thing. People WANT to look younger, usually. The fact that your mind has turned a HUGE positive such as this into a huge negative, and even an outright barrier to you even being able to date at all, is fucking ridiculous.

Ridiculous, and sadly a common issue. Negative self-talk is a well-known issue in the field of psychology. All of us have such a negative voice in our heads that often lies to us.

Not fighting that voice, leads to loneliness, anxiety, depression, etc. Fighting, debating with, and fact-checking that voice to keep it honest, is one of the most important things we can do to improve our lives and overall mental health.

And if you can't find a way to start fighting back, NOTHING we say here can help you. No good advice will be good enough, because you'll sabotage it.

3

I start community college in the fall and the average age of the college is over 30 so I know I won’t meet anyone there.

Look, this is just fucking bullshit. Really. Community college is a place where you will meet a lot of people. Average age aside, you're going there so it's not like people your age won't be there. It's ridiculous that this voice is twisting facts around to where it basically says that you will be the only person your age there.

Which is just unbelievable.

And even if you encounter someone your age, that negative voice has sold you on the idea that even people your age won't be interested because you look good for your age.

Seriously, people post this kind of stuff pretty much every day around here. Negative self-talk and the consequences of it, are honestly some the hugest issues on the sub-reddit.

4

I just can’t think of a way around the issue. Any advice?

The way around is to start debating this negative voice in your head. There's no other way. You have to start debating yourself when this voice pipes up with something negative like, "Women your age won't find you attractive because you look young." Look for counter-examples. Be on the look-out for evidence for or against something like this.

Stop lying down and taking it.

Title	Any advice?
Author	m34h25
Upvotes	6
Comments	2
Date	April 9, 2019 11:02 PM UTC (7 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/bbeowz/any_advice/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/any-advice.1466136 https://theredarchive.com/post/1466136

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