I have noticed a phenomena whereby I am having more success by “playing it cool” versus approaching girls. I cannot tell what to make of it and if it may be just specific to the scenes I am. A friend of mine said I “observe” too much and that could be it.

I would appreciate any insights as I don’t think it’s a sustainable MO.

  • Saw a group of 4 girls at a day party. Tried to talk to one of their group, but conversations never went anywhere. Saw them again at a venue after that and it’s game on, dancing with one, being called naughty, etc.

  • Similar situation. Group of girls I couldn’t talk to at first party came on quite strong at another venue. Mainly driven by fact I was talking to her friend and not giving her attention. It was not intentional as my friend was talking to the more attractive one.

  • Was at a different party and not really focused on talking to girls. An attractive girl grabbed me to start dancing, grabbed food after, etc. Next time I saw her randomly at the same venue a month later she basically ignored me.

  • Twice girls were at a venue with another group of guys, so I did not put any effort into the situation. Both offered to exchange phone numbers anyway.

None of these interactions led to much more beyond the initial night, so I would also appreciate insight if they were headfakes or I screwed something up logistically.