Approaching crush through Facebook..scared to mess things up

physicalbitcoin · 2017-12-24T22:30:00+00:00

Never tell a girl under 30 she's gorgeous. They already know guys are horny. Find something about her soul that you like.
I would take an hour out of your day to get some good pics taken.
Be honest about yourself and tell her you don't like social media. She might respect that.
You can send a message without sending a friend request, normally. It's less invasive.

jez02 · 2017-12-24T23:16:39+00:00

Considering the fact you only get to see her once a month I'd say go for it. Be honest though. Like tell you'd much rather talk to her in person but had to approach her through fb cause barely see her. Keep this short and don't ramble on about it. Be unapologetic too. As in, don't try to defuse or downplay certain things by adding a lol, haha or whatever kind of emoticon at the end of the message whenever you actually mean what you say.

Oh and you might mess up, sure. The fact that you stated that you're scared to mess thinga up already sort of indicates you're placing her on a pedestal. Instead, try this mindset. Consider the fact that there are so many other 'gorgeous' chicks. What makes this one so special? Her looks are what got your initial attention, but now you're messaging her to find out whether there's anything other than her looks that meets your standards for whatever you consider makes someone a person that you'd actually want to have around in your life.

Think of it like a test for her. You're testing her to see whether you two actually match on an inner level. I think that by having this mindset and approaching the interaction like this, you put her on a level equal to yourself automatically. It communicates integrity. If she says something you don't like, don't supplicate. Yeah, she might be totally boring or vapid, or she might be really engaging and thoughtful. That's what you're trying to find out. I also think this eliminates the fear of messing up by saying something wrong. Nothing you say is wrong if it's said with honest intent. If she doesn't like something you say or doesn't like your dark humor or whatever then that's her problem, right? All it means is that the two of you might not fit that well together. Too bad. There's an infinite amount of other interesting and cool chicks out there.

Alextryingforgrate · 2017-12-24T18:47:18+00:00

Since you have the confidence to want to do things why not go talk to her in person. Kinda seems a little weak sauce to put all this effort in to your inner game and you're worried about what shell think of you on your 1 pic facebook feed when you can show her the whole package in person.

NilsFlair · 2017-12-24T20:49:26+00:00

Getting her on FB might is an option that is easier for your emotions, but in reality it’s harder to pull of.

Because you run the risk of her denying your request, and then you have to run text game on her (which is not nearly as effective as a real conversation).

I understand how you feel about approaching her irl.

But doing that and asking her out, or even just asking for her fb or number is a much better idea.

Even if you don’t get a date then and there, and even if you don’t get her number, she will have noticed you (it’s better to get noticed irl then online).

This is my advice, but you can of course make both ways work.

jennyev · 2017-12-25T02:22:04+00:00

I don't wanna sound negative, but here's what's probably gonna happen: you'll never have her, no matter how you approach. Why? - Because of the very fact that she is your crush.

That being said, make an approach, but have no expectations. Try to imagine the worst and deal with it when it happens.

Truth be told you'll sooner for later forget her and have a couple of crushes with other girls, which in your mind will be always better than the previous ones (even though at the moment it feels the current one is the best in the world)

To maximize your chances from 0.001% to 0.1% you can:

Have no expectations.
Get her attention somehow, it's better if you message her, but she might not see the message request, so you can try sending her a friend request after.
If you can get to meet her in a common social circle, "where you're not there just for her", it's better for a start. But as an alternative, you should try to approach her personally if you have no friends in common.
Try to think of a few common scenarios in advance, some cool things and stories you could tell
Try to be kinda funny and kinda cocky at the same time, kinda put her down, then kind compliment her right after, push and pull.
Start flirting. If she likes it, flirt more. If she still likes it, time to move to the next step which is meeting in person, or if you're already in person, kissing. (But she's probably not gonna like flirting if she isn't attracted to you)
Don't tell her that you like her upfront. If you do, your chances drop down significantly with more than 1000%.
Keep in mind that if you do let her know that you're into her, she's not gonna reject you completely (if she does, you should genuinely thank her), but she's gonna be very ambiguous about it because she wants to have you around "just in case", like she probably has many other guys.
If you keep postponing approaching her to a moment you're gonna be better, you're gonna be wasting time and stopping your improvement.
If after approaching and getting rejected you don't get to the point you give up and stop hoping to get this girl in the future, you're simply fucking yourself and wasting your time, and stopping your growth.

Zoidberg22 · 2017-12-25T04:20:24+00:00

I wouldn't do it. If you met her and talked to her before but only have her FB, it's fine but otherwise a random guy hitting her up on a non dating app seems creepy at least to her Imo

Title	Approaching crush through Facebook..scared to mess things up
Author	RainRedWinter
Upvotes	2
Comments	8
Date	December 24, 2017 6:25 PM UTC (8 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/7lwml2/approaching_crush_through_facebookscared_to_mess/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/approaching-crush-through-facebookscared-to-mess.1438978 https://theredarchive.com/post/1438978

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