Bringing up the ex

seduction-ModTeam · 2024-11-28T01:22:09+00:00

This post had to be taken down because it appears to be focused on a specific situation or person. While Field Reports deal with specific situations and people, remember that the focus is different:

A field report explains a lesson learned or demonstrates a Seduction concept.
If the point of this post is asking how to get that specific girl, it is out of bounds except in a Basic Questions Thread.

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GrowCanadian · 2024-11-27T04:46:49+00:00

I’m not sure what other people on this sub will say but I can tell you the last girl I dated was in a similar situation. Talked about her ex to me but I used it to springboard to get her to open up about other things in her life. Ended up dating her the entire summer and had one of the best summers of my life. She ended up ending it with me but I still had a great time with the hottest girl I’ve ever dated.

Try and get her to hangout outside of work. Go do something fun with her and enjoy yourself. The only warning I’ll give you is dating coworkers can get messy. If this is a real career be careful. Once you date and breakup I’ve learned the hard way that things get sour and jealousy is real.

musicbyMOE · 2024-11-27T04:39:52+00:00

Well first of all,

She is a coworker so do you really want to mix personal life and work together?
You gotta make it known soon what your intentions are before friendzone

Onzalimey · 2024-11-27T04:50:41+00:00

Wouldn’t say it’s a bad thing. Or good. Nothing really. Def could still be interested even though she’s mentioning him. Sounds very recent which is likely why

Decent_Bread6026 · 2024-11-27T09:52:56+00:00

If she is recently single she is probably still on the rebound, I had this similar situation last year ended up dating her for four months then got completely ghosted out of the blue, no explanation nothing. Things seemed great but bam … dropped like shit off a shovel literally in a weekend (what a waste of money on Christmas presents and free lifts to work) but this is what you will get. If it’s a quick f*ck buddy you want then simply invite her out and smash her problems away. But it’s unlikely you will get anything worthwhile long term out of this girl.

Anyway there is a good chance in 2-4 months the ex guy comes back, she gets the same “feelings” and she leaves you to go back to him, or she will dump anyone else she starts dating around this time.

Leave her alone and single for several months until she has healed and emotionally moved on then test the waters just be her co worker and keep any socialising distant. Start hanging with other co workers at coffee breaks or start listening to a new podcast or read a new book if she starts wanting to join you and say you’re fine. You can remain flirty and fun in your work interactions but draw the line with anything else. Also start dating and flirting with other hot girls. Let her know you are not easy and not invested in her at all.

Basically give her the social cold shoulder and only interact during work, don’t go into “friend zone” by hanging out with her and not yet ready to close the deal but consolidate that rapport and trust you already built for another day.

Oh and stop listening or opinionating on her sad ass break up story, jokingly remind her you are not her Psychologist or Girlfriend or Gay best friend so she should go tell them instead. if that’s her only story then she clearly hasn’t moved on in her mind from the ex and she is useless to any man wanting a relationship until she does. Which will take months from now.

Dandys3107 · 2024-11-27T06:30:58+00:00

It may be perceived kinda double sided. On one hand, if you will keep getting too deep into the frame of being her emotional towel, you will be surely perceived more like an asexual friend than potential partner. If you don't enjoy it, you should rather cut it off, but politely. On the other, she may bring it up because she thinks you may repair her emotions in that dimension. But instead of taking her miseries to yourself, provide her with new, positive thrills. Standard thing, keep coming closer, get personal, maintain eye contact, casually show off your attractive traits etc. Game formula doesn't change, you need to take initiative and make some moves.

Eezay · 2024-11-27T18:51:40+00:00

I find it's somewhat normal to talk about your ex in some context. Just matters to me how they say it and how often. If she talks about him too regularly, without a reason, or speaks excessively good OR bad of him, that's a huge red flag in my experience. But it's certainly normal if an ex is brought up here and there without any hard feelings attached.

Glum_Rhubarb_3175 · 2024-11-27T08:45:39+00:00

Its clear that you started from comfort, same as all other simps. She will find you good but not attractive.

So start with attraction. Dunno your game level, so here are basics:

Take side of her ex, not her. She liked him for a reason.
Always end conversation first, wait untill she first starts the conversation, invites you for coffe breaks and so on.
Get some hot girl asking for you at work, or calling you, or fake it till you make it.
Study wfat building attraction is.
Please no Dale Carnegie rapport building shit unless she does strong moves, like invites you for a date, etc.

Title	Bringing up the ex
Author	Any-Mastodon2649
Upvotes	4
Comments	10
Date	November 27, 2024 4:25 AM UTC (1 year ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/1h0vzrw/bringing_up_the_ex/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/bringing-up-the-ex.1536993 https://theredarchive.com/post/1536993

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