Can't get over my crippling AA.

Thiickshake · 2013-06-10T04:04:43+00:00

Get a friend and play 'Hey, have you met Ted?'. Its easier to approach for other people. Its also effective, and if they've seen the How I Met Your Mother episode, then it conveys intent as well.

Dumbastronaut · 2013-06-10T08:23:33+00:00

I stopped jacking off. By week 2 I was naturally approaching every hottie I saw without even thinking twice.

mileshigh_23 · 2013-06-10T04:15:33+00:00

I started game to help me get over crippling social anxiety. Within a few months of throwing myself into direct game, I went from being panic-attack terrified of approaching, to literally running up to the hottest girls in town to introduce myself. I got pretty damn good too with about an 80% number close rate for each approach.

Try this:

1 - Your new goal in game isn't to be successful with women. It's to be completely and utterly comfortable with getting rejected. Next time you're afraid to approach a girl, you know you have NOT reached this goal yet because you still give a fuck. Now go introduce yourself to her: if she rejects you, just add one notch to your belt of learning to be ok with girls rejecting you. When you're no longer afraid of rejection, you're automatically the top 1% of PUAs.

2 - Before I really got into game, I spent about two years studying indirect game (Mystery Method mainly) and didn't get anywhere. Switch to Direct game. It sounds terrifying at first, but once you make that first approach, your AA starts to go down big time.

recyclablebantha · 2013-06-10T12:02:29+00:00

What i'm looking for here is some stories from you guys. How did you get over your AA? Was it as simple as just manning up and doing it?

First off, it will help if you start deconstructing the mindset that's behind your AA. You have control over your thoughts and right now you're allowing them to control you. The moment you start thinking that you CANNOT APPROACH, you need to start stomping down on the thoughts involved in this. Because chances are, that they're irrational thought about how you're going to screw things up. Also, this is important to note: this girl you're having AA over, you DON'T KNOW her. You don't even know if she's cool or not. She might have a cock for all you know. (Okay, kind of extreme, but the point is that the beginning is a discovery phase.) There is no reason to place high importance on an approach.

Secondly, it go for low-hanging fruit: start talking to everybody! Guys you don't know, girls you don't find attractive, everybody! It's going to remain difficult to approach a beautiful woman if you aren't being social as much as possible and then you try to turn it on when you see an HB. Seriously, you're setting it up to be more difficult that way.

Thirdly, use the point people in your life to help you approach!

puaCurveBall · 2013-06-10T20:53:18+00:00

Look into rejection therapy.

Start out with just asking the time, or directions, or whatever. Slowly work up from there.

sunbirth · 2013-06-11T22:08:20+00:00

Hey... you just have to feel it, and make a decision.... Do you like them or not? If you do, then you have to go for it... otherwise why the fuck are you even alive cuz you yourself would be denying yourself your own opportunity thats in your life... just got to know what you want.. then go for it... Your AA is just a feeling... feel it, accept it, and make your decision... If you are just starting out... if you feel AA, then go for it regardless of who it is so that you can know that it is easy. It's like if somebody is afraid of little spiders but you are like whatever its a spider get over it.. if you are scared of spiders just stay calm and pick one up. Eventually you will realize that you are so many times bigger than a little spider.

Meatwadlle · 2013-06-12T18:07:51+00:00

Started by just talking to everyone via situational observations. ie) weather,time,other people, events. "Damn its hot out" Just statements about my surroundings. Then moved onto social momentum building. Every day i start with 0 momentum, i just get into the mindset that I am normally sociable guy that talks alot. So i start throwing out conversations to everyone/anyone. After a while it becomes natural and then the rest of the day im on fire. Then i can approach with almost no anxiety cause i truely dont give a fuck.

*TLDR: Each day build social momentum via observing surroundings.

SpaceToaster · 2013-06-13T07:01:58+00:00

You do NOT need to be confident to approach. It is not a precursor. It will follow naturally once you have more experiences, and make your interactions even better (positive feedback loop,) but is ABSOLUTELY not required to make an approach. Waiting for confidence before making a single approach is like refusing to do a math problem until you are a math expert. WTF?
You are going to feel butterflies and nervous. I still feel them before first dates. Learn to recognize, then enjoy the fleeing, like riding a roller-coaster. You will not die. You will be OK. Heck, it might even go GREAT.
Instead of fighting your emotions, embrace them. Tell her how you feel, if you must. Tell her that she is really cute and you feel nervous, but you just had to come say hi. Oddly enough if you tell a girl she is making you feel nervous she will more often than not think you are lying about being nervous to seem cute. The reason being is that typically only very confident people can be so direct and honest about their emotions.
You do NOT need a line. Simply introduce yourself. Ask her about about her favorite fruit or something in her cart. "Ah, never tried that, is it tasty? I'd say the craziest fruit I've eaten is (yada yada yada). Well hey, it was great to meet you, but I've got to get shopping, my friends and I are making dinner later. Definitely would like to meet up with you some time though, what's your number."

Now get out there and meet some women. Because if I meet that girl in a store of mine, I'll be making her one of my famous pizzas later.

Title	Can't get over my crippling AA.
Author	[deleted]
Upvotes	5
Comments	27
Date	June 10, 2013 3:53 AM UTC (13 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/1g0vvz/cant_get_over_my_crippling_aa/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/cant-get-over-my-crippling-aa.1353652 https://theredarchive.com/post/1353652

Comments