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[–]CuriousMike1 4 points5 points6 points 4 years ago (14 children) | Copy Link
Drop her and move on. Meet other girls
[–]ColdBeing 4 years ago [recovered] (13 children) | Copy Link
It's just weird to me. So just straight up ghost her? You think she's playing games?
[–]CuriousMike1 2 points3 points4 points 4 years ago (12 children) | Copy Link
If she were interested she’d make the effort and make it easy to link up. She’d be charming even, but that doesn’t seem to be the case. You spent the night kissing into late hours and bent over backwards to accommodate her faux request for dinner.
From here on you’ll just continue chasing her and nothing good can come of that. Go meet other girls and try not to make the same mistakes. Don’t waste your time smooching and trying to get crumbs. Find a girl who’s actually attracted and wants to see you as much as or more than you want to see her.
[–]ColdBeing 4 years ago [recovered] (11 children) | Copy Link
Well I was the one that suggested having dinner after the sunset but she told me it would be pretty late if we were to eat, which I agree. But she didn’t want me over her place for the 2nd date. I mean I can’t fight it because it’ll just make me look pushy.
I’m mainly looking for a relationship but I do have girls where they want me and make it easy for me but I just don’t see them as relationship material with me.
It’s been hard finding someone who wants the same thing as me and to continually escalate things. Idk why she was putting in effort sharing playlist and other bs with me after our date and then pull something like this
[–]CuriousMike1 1 point2 points3 points 4 years ago (10 children) | Copy Link
Maybe try being more of a buyer and a little bit more of a challenge for the girl. What else do you have going on in your life? When you’re too eager to get into a relationship it can turn a girl off. Perhaps you’re better off playing the field and working on you until you find a girl that you really can vibe and build with. And even then you should take it slow.
[–]ColdBeing 4 years ago [recovered] (9 children) | Copy Link
I don't bring anything about a relationship up, I just go out there and have fun. Being flirty and teasing. When she asked about what I do for a living I told her I was a male stripper and she couldn't tell if I was being serious or not and I told her my actual job as a side hustle. I bring that kind of vibe
I'm done with my bachelor's in 3 more days, planning on pursuing my master's after, got a good job with the DoD and climbing and have my own apartment space. I hangout with friends and do other hobbies when I'm not preoccupied with school.
After a few hours of not responding, she just texted me "Not sure yet my brother will be in town and idk what days we are doing stuff yet"
Does that deserve a text back? because I feel like you should know when and what day a person is coming into town.
[–]CuriousMike1 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (8 children) | Copy Link
Sounds like you have a lot going for you bud. I’d go radio silent and go meet knew girls.
[–]ColdBeing 4 years ago [recovered] (7 children) | Copy Link
Thanks, I still haven't texted her and she tripled text me saying "I can let you know when I find out from him"
So that's an improvement
[–]CuriousMike1 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (6 children) | Copy Link
An improvement would be her actually suggesting a day and time and not keeping you on the line. You don’t have time to wait for her to have info she should already have. I’d take that as her juggling dates and keeping one on the back burner. Just saying. I’d text “hey no worries, I have something that came up. When you have a better handle on your schedule and can set a definite date to hangout let me know”. And go about your business.
[–]ColdBeing 4 years ago [recovered] (5 children) | Copy Link
Yeah, you're definitely right. I'm most likely just bullshitting myself.
I like her more than most girls I've been with and could see myself trending towards something serious by the way she carries herself as we keep talking and getting to know one another (I'm very picky with who I seriously date-fuckbuddies or fwb don't get the same treatment). She doesn't seem like a hoe but yeah, it's not fair to me that I'm not getting energy reciprocated.
She mentioned she's on tinder to meet people, so I already know she's going on dates so yeah, I'm not getting her full attention, so I probably am on the backburner so you're most likely right again.
I like the way you put that and wrote almost exact to yours. So, I appreciate going back and forth on this
It's kind of funny that it's like almost 1am when I sent the message and she immediately replied "ok I will"
[–]CuriousMike11 point 4 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link
No problem man. Stop texting. With time you’ll learn to not get too wrapped up too early. Good luck
[–]ColdBeing1 point 4 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link
Thanks man. It’s always the girls that I actually like that I have a problem keeping. I’m probably doing too much too soon, I’m just gonna have to do the bare minimum
She reached out a couple days later "Hey I still dont know what im doing yet this week :/ my brother doesn't set anything in advance and does stuff last minute"
I was gonna reply "Well I'm free tomorrow if you want to get dinner/do the beach, otherwise I'm probably going to have plans later this week if you're still unable to find out from your brother. We can probably try this sometime next week"
Idk if that sounds ok and gives me more of my power back.
Ignore it. Otherwise you’ll be chasing forever. Move on
Yeah I have a feeling it’s just to keep me strung along and as a backup plan. In case she can’t meet anyone else
[–]Ambitious-Ice2357 2 points3 points4 points 4 years ago (5 children) | Copy Link
Don’t reply to her and wait and see what happens. Never pursue a woman that has low interest, or no interest at all.
[–]ColdBeing 4 years ago [recovered] (4 children) | Copy Link
[–]Jack_Knoff2 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Not responding here would be fine. Personally I’d respond with something like “If you have time hit me up and I’ll let you know if I’m free”. Puts it in her and you can fire and forget. If she makes an effort to see you than great but if not that’s your answer. Either way move on and maybe it’s a bonus if she reaches out.
[–]ColdBeing2 points 4 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link
Thanks, I still haven't texted her and she just tripled text me inthe course of several hours saying "I can let you know when I find out from him"
[–]Ambitious-Ice2357 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
I would respond simply with; ok.
[–]CoreyC96 1 point2 points3 points 4 years ago (4 children) | Copy Link
“She wants to take things slow since she always wanted a BF in the past and wants to do a different approach this time by slowing things down to make sure things feel right”
This is an automatic blaring red flag that should not be ignored. Why should you have to pay a higher price (more dates that you’re probably paying for and planning, more of your time, more of your attention) before you get what you really want (sex) than the last Joe Schmoe who got the sex without all that BS. The war was already lost when she said that my guy. You’re the platonic rebound that was used for attention when she needed it and she no longer needs it. There’s nothing you could’ve done to change it and there’s nothing you can do now but move on. My 2 cents.
[–]ColdBeing 4 years ago [recovered] (3 children) | Copy Link
Yeah, seems like she is structured and has rules. I know girls say one thing and they can look past others, I figured I could change the way she felt, which I did. She is probably giving me a hard time since the first time ended up getting a little sexual and she probably knows something sexual will happen the next time. Idk
She texted me a few hours later "Not sure yet my brother will be in town and idk what days we are doing stuff yet"
[–]Due_Practice8634 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
This person's 2 cents sounds like he is approaching the point albeit in a revolting way. You asked for a BJ on the first date. Then on the second proposed mini-golf and going to her place. A lot of women aren't going to like that because at worse it can be unsafe and it's also a cue that there's probably going to be high pressure put upon them having sex. THen when that was shot down you proposed dinner after golf toped off with a sunset-so again a marathon date thats going to have a big push towards sex. If she's really looking for someone to date and you look like your trying to storm the gates as fast as you can...yeah she'll probably drag her feet because she was attracted to you at first but now has the suspicion that you just want one thing from her. Cant blame her for being wary.
I'm just continuing the sexual tension. I mean I didn't tell her to put her hand down my pants. Once she pulled back, I pulled back as well and did no pressuring. And not necessarily, the beach is on the opposite end of where she lives, it's nowhere near close to her place.
But that last bit might be true. She might think I'm too focused on the physical part
[–]Beneficial-Tip-4044 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
lol drop her. stop being a pushover
[–][deleted] 4 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link
[permanently deleted]
[–]ColdBeing 4 years ago [recovered] (2 children) | Copy Link
I mean that all sounds good in theory but if I changed plans from mini golfing to the beach/getting dinner and she’s still giving me a hard time by the particular day I chose (which she had no problems beforehand until I try to set it in stone) it just seems like nudging if she can get her way with me and seems like she’s less interested.
She also still doesn’t know when she’s available even though she’s having someone stay over her place. So it just makes me feel like she I’m not the #1 guy in her book and more of a backup plan if she has dates flaking out to see if she can “squeeze me in”
Since she told me she’s looking to meeting more people (particularly guys because she’s going out on dates) because she doesn’t know many people around here
your paying for all these dates? lmao losing money for someone else to just come along in this girls life & fuck her for free. L
[+]FractalGuise -7 points-6 points-5 points 4 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
She is probably talking to too other dudes with really big ducks. I suggest start taking penis enlarging supplements so you can get on the same level as the competition. You have absolutely no chance of getting this girl with your current equipment, trust me. Lucky for you i sell exactly what you need OP.
[–]ColdBeing 4 years ago [recovered] (1 child) | Copy Link
Talking to other dudes, yeah most likely but tf. I’m not small by any means lol
[–]FractalGuise -4 points-3 points-2 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Damn that’s unfortunate. If you have a decent sized dick that can only mean your romantic game is trash. Lucky for you I actually sell dating guides that have 100% success rate on getting any girl you want. My basic subscription starts at just $49.99 a week.
[–]funkmaster322 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
I feel like either option is viable in your case... With A) she might be less likely to think you have hard feelings about it. Which displays a bit more strength/independence in my opinion.
Another thing, after the first kiss, she asked about my ex and in turn i asked about hers. She told me she wants to be desired and that her ex stopped doing that. Wouldn't iniaite or take her out anywhere and had no drive to better himself. I have my shit together and while I had my arm around her, I reached down and grabbed her ass and said "you're telling me he didn't desire this. You got hung up with the wrong guy" with a smirk. That was before the car.
You think she's game playing?
[–]funkmaster322 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
I dont think it matters.
bro FUCK THAT lmao. she knows what you want so shes trying to tease you with the idea of sex to date you longer and get a boyfriend. just be flakey & dont give her any attention lol. if YOU dont want to date her seriously, dont.
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[–]CuriousMike1 4 points5 points6 points (14 children) | Copy Link
[–]ColdBeing [recovered] (13 children) | Copy Link
[–]CuriousMike1 2 points3 points4 points (12 children) | Copy Link
[–]ColdBeing [recovered] (11 children) | Copy Link
[–]CuriousMike1 1 point2 points3 points (10 children) | Copy Link
[–]ColdBeing [recovered] (9 children) | Copy Link
[–]CuriousMike1 0 points1 point2 points (8 children) | Copy Link
[–]ColdBeing [recovered] (7 children) | Copy Link
[–]CuriousMike1 0 points1 point2 points (6 children) | Copy Link
[–]ColdBeing [recovered] (5 children) | Copy Link
[–]CuriousMike11 point [recovered] | Copy Link
[–]ColdBeing1 point [recovered] | Copy Link
[–]ColdBeing1 point [recovered] | Copy Link
[–]CuriousMike11 point [recovered] | Copy Link
[–]ColdBeing1 point [recovered] | Copy Link
[–]Ambitious-Ice2357 2 points3 points4 points (5 children) | Copy Link
[–]ColdBeing [recovered] (4 children) | Copy Link
[–]Jack_Knoff2 0 points1 point2 points (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]ColdBeing2 points [recovered] | Copy Link
[–]Ambitious-Ice2357 0 points1 point2 points (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]ColdBeing2 points [recovered] | Copy Link
[–]CoreyC96 1 point2 points3 points (4 children) | Copy Link
[–]ColdBeing [recovered] (3 children) | Copy Link
[–]Due_Practice8634 0 points1 point2 points (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]ColdBeing1 point [recovered] | Copy Link
[–]Beneficial-Tip-4044 0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–][deleted] (3 children) | Copy Link
[–]ColdBeing [recovered] (2 children) | Copy Link
[–]Beneficial-Tip-4044 0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[+]FractalGuise -7 points-6 points-5 points (2 children) | Copy Link
[–]ColdBeing [recovered] (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]FractalGuise -4 points-3 points-2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]funkmaster322 0 points1 point2 points (2 children) | Copy Link
[–]ColdBeing [recovered] (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]funkmaster322 0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]Beneficial-Tip-4044 0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link