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norwegiandoggo · 2021-09-18T11:50:07+00:00

This is a great goal and you're already halfway there when you can identify the issue on your own. I recommend you read some Brené Brown and Mark Manson (models). Brené Brown talks about two different mindsets. One is trying to fit it. The other is showing up.

The "fit in" mindset is the needy and insecure way of seeking belonging. You try to change your behavior and appearance in order to gain acceptance. You give up part of your identity in the process. Who are you really? Nobody knows. You are like the Pokémon ditto, just changing to whatever others want you to be. This isn't healthy. You walk around being fake.

The "showing up" mindset is to show everybody who you are. Show up in the clothes, behavior, personality, and opinions that you have. If people accept you, awesome. It means they like the real you! If they don't like you, fuck 'em.

Mark Manson talks about this in another way, saying you should aim to be polarizing. Meaning, force others to have an opinion about you, good or bad. Be something! The opposite is trying to please everyone or making everyone like you. That neediness is inherently unattractive.

Find out who you want to be. And then show up! Show them who you are. If they like it, awesome. If they don't, well, you're not everyone's cup of tea and that is fine.

JacobMoogberg69 · 2021-09-18T12:45:19+00:00

You have to condition yourself to become indifferent to women. Now, nothing wrong with a beautiful girl making you feel great. Sorry to say, but it turns out there is scientific research that says just being in the presence of attractive women raises your testosterone and feel good hormones. Is it any wonder that guys who work in male dominated sausage farm places tend to be frustrated, aggressive and angry?

The first step towards achieving this is to recognize just how affected you are by appearances and illusions. Women will lose their looks and sexuality to affect you. If you are emotionally reacting to her beauty it signals that you are mentally weak. You are easy to manipulate. That's how strippers can get guys to spend thousands of dollars on them and at the end maybe get a mediocre BJ if that.

Women are very good at this, so the only way to battle it is to see through it. Become aware of how women use looks, posing and female drama to manipulate you and get you to react emotionally. They do this not in attempt to screw with you, but to actually test the men who are strong enough to not be affected. The reasoning behind it is that if they can easily manipulate and emotionally affect a guy, than others can do that easily too and therefore his genes are not strong and he will be easy pray to others. They also don't feel safe with a guy like this because he is easy to push around and intimidate and she will be scared in his weak presence because she can be a victim too.

So when you start noticing getting emotionally affected by a woman including the good feeling of validation, start repeating to yourself "I'm immune to female drama and BS, it's just an illusion out there to test me". Practice being indifferent to it, ie don't get emotionally caught up in the good feelings or bad ones.

The more and more immune you become, the more female validation will not matter to you. The more you stand up to women and call them out on their BS, the more your self respect and confidence will increase. Just practice.

Hmmoklolthisisfine · 2021-09-18T14:38:10+00:00

This is an awesome goal and mindset you want to build!

I have to admit I even fall into this negative mindset. There was a girl recently that I was seeing and I was thrown off by how little interest she showed me outside of our meetups. I’m used to girls blowing me and this girl made absolutely 0 effort haha but I realize it’s all in my head and we still hangout and have a good time.

Anyways you’re right the self improvement part is really important but you have to be doing things with your life that add value. Things that make you proud of who you are. Find a goal to attain, or a purpose. Something that you can work at every day and keep you on a path forward. As you crush your goals you build confidence and develop a deeper understanding of who you are as a person. The clearer your self image is to you, the more you will know just how valuable you are and you will never need the validation of anyone, especially women.

donnybdonnyb · 2021-09-18T22:09:47+00:00

A woman doesn’t make the man. A man is who he is regardless of a woman. When you learn to seek validation from the most high women don’t really matter. Why would validation from a woman matter when she’s beneath you and meant to be following your lead?

Title	[deleted by user]
Author	[deleted]
Upvotes	21
Comments	8
Date	September 18, 2021 11:42 AM UTC (4 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/pqkwu3/deleted_by_user/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/deleted-by-user.1275908 https://theredarchive.com/post/1275908

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