does confidence matter for girls?

aaronob · 2012-04-18T06:04:01+00:00

Simple answer: no. I have a friend who is extremely good looking, but he lacks confidence and is a complete pussy when it comes to talking to girls. Sure, chicks love him when they first see him, but not for long once they actually get to know him. On the other hand, you can be average looking and confidence will definitely make up for that.

2012-04-18T08:11:07+00:00

If you want to have a serious adult relationship with mutual respect than I would say that confidence certainly matters

The_Magnificent · 2012-04-18T09:51:41+00:00

Depends on the guy, obviously. Some guy like disturbing depressed girls, others like the shy kind, others again prefer confident girls.

Most success you'll likely have with being confident. I prefer the confidence. It makes women a lot more attractive if they're confident and even a bit arrogant.

Good looks work either way. Being attractive makes you more approachable to more people. We all care about good looks, we all desire someone we can wake up to and then want to stare at for hours.

Also, confidence certainly helps your looks, though. Imagine a twin of which one lacks any self esteem and the other is highly confident. While physically identical, the confident one will shine.

BehindtheHype · 2012-04-18T12:19:07+00:00

I think confidence is key in all facets of life, for all people. I always compare dating to sales, for instance. You're always selling yourself whether it's to get a girl, get a job, land a client, get a promotion, etc.

A lot of that is presentation. Two people could spit the same game - one confident and one apprehensive - and the person you gain a rapport with and trust is who you'll go with.

I had an old sales manager that explained confidence and rapport like this: "if a friend tells you about a gas station with really low gas prices, you're gonna go there. You're not gonna think about it, 'cause they are a friend."

dablac · 2012-04-18T15:36:21+00:00

No. For either gender confidence is far more important then aesthetic attractiveness.

Using pickup (from a male perspective) as an example, looks without confidence will never get you anywhere (speaking from experience :/) but confidence without looks still enables you to perform well consistently.

With both confidence and good looks you would expect to do better then confident but less good looking people, though that's obvious.

Also as a side note, mental/emotional instability (especially when it manifests as doing/saying crazy shit) will inevitably fuck up any interpersonal relationship.

TL;DR: Confidence is everything but good looks certainly make it easier

2012-04-18T18:30:47+00:00

blanket answers to questions like this don't mean a lot.

It depends on the girl, and it depends on the night. If she's nearly blackout and just wants to look at something pretty while she gets railed, she'll opt for the better looking dude who's a wet noodle.

Earlier in the night with fewer drinks in her, when she's having actual interactions, she may well be more attracted to the more average dude who's more fun and confident.

Depends on the venue, also. Loud dark clubs reward the tall and good looking more than quiet bars do. Learn what venues play to your strengths.

HolePunch66 · 2012-04-18T19:25:37+00:00

I'm ugly on the inside, and that is what counts.

Title	does confidence matter for girls?
Author	[deleted]
Upvotes	4
Comments	8
Date	April 18, 2012 5:46 AM UTC (14 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/sflpu/does_confidence_matter_for_girls/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/does-confidence-matter-for-girls.1331505 https://theredarchive.com/post/1331505

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