escalating without IOI's?

hunterpua · 2019-04-17T15:51:00+00:00

First, don't be so arrogant as to think you are good enough to know every single time whether a girl is into you or not.

Second, it sounds like you're skipping a lot when you escalate.

Escalation should start from the second you meet her and it should start with your baseline of touches, the social touches.

Social touches are the touches you do with everyone, girl, guy, hot, attractive, ugly, whatever.

They are the touches you make when you shake hands, when you lead, when look at a tattoo or examine an interesting article of clothing they have on.

They are the touches you make when you're telling a story or describing something in conversation and you're using gestures to create more impact and then touch her to illustrate what you're describing even more.

You don't want to go from zero to having your hands on her waist and pressing your bodies together.

You want her to already be so used to your touch by the time you do that.

So start touching everyone the second you meet them so that its a very smooth transition to when you want things to get sexual.

If you can't see any IOIs how do you know if she's ready to be escalated on or not??

Escalate.

If she does not resist at all, keep going.

If she shows you an IOD (indicator of disinterest) then stop.

That's how to escalate when you aren't seeing any IOIs.

...

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WIA20XX · 2019-04-17T17:50:44+00:00

Hey friend, I think you have some of these terms mixed up. What you have above is not indirect, that's beating around the bush.

Indirect is you demonstrating your value, and she becomes attracted to that display of value. She is indirectly attracted.

You're doing your thing and she wonders "Who is this guy? Why isn't he talking to me? Let me try to attract his attention."

Indirect is not really the best word for what actually happens.

Remember that the guys who came up with this system of indirect were performers who could grab a crowd's attention. Both could tell a joke, do a magic trick, or recount a story and hold court essentially. That's value in a bar or nightclub.

Most guys that try to learn indirect don't have the underlying skill set and reference experiences. I can still do strawberry fields and the cube, as well as "do you believe in spells?" today because I had to learn all the prerequisites. For new guys, especially day game guys, I'm speaking ancient Sumerian.

The pickup answer is that you assume attraction, specifically within the A1-A3 phases, you assume that her continued presence is her indicator of interest.

You could be five minutes into an improvised spiel, if you still have her attention, if she gave you a nod, or a "yeah" you have to assume that it's on.

It might not be a real "it's on" But you assume that it is. You act as if she's already attracted and in to you. You are acting on a delusion to be objective about it, but you have to act on that delusion, on that irrational belief in self.

Delusional politicians get votes.
Confidence scams work because the con man believes in himself.

That's exactly what is happening here. It is the law of emotional transfer. It's the same thing that turns a drunk crowd into a mosh pit.

For whatever reason, pickup gurus don't like to talk about well understood psychology. But that's what is happening here.

Now when you get an IOI you give her a chance to cooperate. (The old school term is compliance testing, but compliance is not what you want. You want the girl to want to do things that many you happy) If she doesn't cooperate, you give her an indicator of disinterest. From there continue to give value.

Assume attraction again, and give her a smaller chance to cooperate. When she cooperates, you give her an indicator of your interest in her.

After a few rounds of her investing in you, you switch to building trust, comfort, and rapport.

This is straight out of the manual and uncontroversial.

From what you've written, it doesn't seem like you're doing anything close to this.

I have given you the answer from the manual, but I don't think that solves the problem you're actually asking about.

You're doing a delayed direct approach and you don't know how to go from casual chat that she could have with anyone to a man to woman chat.

The answer is the same, you assume that because she's still listening and participating that she is in fact interested in you romantically/ man to woman.

When you act as if this is already a man to woman interaction, she will catch up and try to respond. Her desire to set you straight or to do with the flow is the same pickup wise. You are dictating the pace. She is reacting to you. If

So the have two options.

Option 1 is to test her cooperation by asking her to do something.

Could you hold my drink.

This is phrased as and delivered in a tone where she can say no.

Option 2 is to escalate.

Verbal escalation is flirting. "You're kind of sexy when you say that"
Touching is escalation. "Can you play piano?" Then put your hands up to measure hands.
Moving her around is escalation. Let's sit over there. Let's go to the bar. Let's step outside for some air.
Telling her what to do is escalation. So any of these things where you lead and she follows is escalation.

The difference between cooperation testing and escalation is subtle, but most of pickup is subtle. Guys that learn start with testing but move towards escalation.

After you get experienced with both, you'll know when testing is superior to escalation.

Title	escalating without IOI's?
Author	ResidentCut
Upvotes	6
Comments	3
Date	April 17, 2019 2:40 PM UTC (7 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/be8l3c/escalating_without_iois/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/escalating-without-iois.1466705 https://theredarchive.com/post/1466705

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