First date tips

Western-Month-3877 · 2026-06-20T20:21:11+00:00

2 hours is way too long for small talks, especially if it didn’t go nowhere.

There’s no “wrong” conversation topics, if that’s what you meant. But I believe the most typical problem in regards of talks, is guys don’t escalate. I’m not only talking about physical escalation.

There’s always a loophole in any topics that you can redirect it into an escalation. From topics of jobs to families, heck even topics on wars and deaths. What I meant was that you should escalate it to “you and me” topics. That’s where you could create sparks and chemistry. Yes you could also have flowing conversations, but that’s useless if there’s no escalation. Flowing conversation is what you have between you and your buddies. You don’t wanna trap yourself into a friend zone.

I give you credit tho for having small talks for 2 hours. Most guys can’t even do this, they get stuck at “what should I say next” stage. But again, flowing convos are what happens among friends. You gotta level up, going to the next stage.

BrutalLeeMean · 2026-06-20T20:12:50+00:00

no just go with the flow .. unfortunately chemistry & connection is something u can’t force. Usually when u get with the right person u can talk for hours with them about any & everything

Economy_Parsnip650 · 2026-06-20T20:54:39+00:00

I am leaving out escalation, as that is a topic in its own right.

Anyway you said 2 hours of "small talk"... I have no clue, what "small talk" means to you. For me it is shallow stuff, that means nothing.

Out of interest, were you doing either of the following:

A) Asking for facts and figures about "military law". Not sure how to describe that perfectly, as I am not a thesis writer. But were you basically just asking shit like "what hours do you work", "how many people do you work with". Like I say, basically asking for facts and figures.

B ) Playing conversational "Snap".... You go through different questions and topics, until finally.... you find one you both have in common and "SNAP", you focus on that.

Now, as for my own conversational style, and I have no idea how to put this into words.

I basically listen for the emotion behind what she says, and ask about that...

IE:

Me: So what is it you do day to day, apart from meeting with guys in bars

Her: I work in military law.

Now personally, I do not give a fuck what she says, be it Military Law, Astronaut, Fashion Model, Ballet Instructor or even pig farmer.

What I care about, is how does she sound when she says it, enthusiastic, bored, annoyed, stressed.

Then I ask about that.

i.e.

"You sound really enthusiastic about that, what led you to making that choice in life, or was it more of a calling?"

Yeah this shit will not get you laid, does not escalate things, will not make her get down on her knees and give you a gobble.

But its more interesting than asking questions like its a god damn interview.

Like I say, I do not even know how I would start putting my conversational style into a Thesis type post.

Title	First date tips
Author	lars2x
Upvotes	3
Comments	10
Date	June 20, 2026 8:06 PM UTC (1 month ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/1ub65gn/first_date_tips/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/first-date-tips.1583250 https://theredarchive.com/post/1583250

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