In the past 10 years, I essentially went on a life hiatus to set up my career. I got back on Facebook a month ago and reached out to an old friend who I used to play tennis with when we were both 11-14yo. Note that we haven't talked/seen each other in 10 years. She got hotter, I got sexier, both 24yo now. It's all quite delicious, or so I thought.

WE MEET FOR DRINKS

  • I work in consulting/wear a suit to our meeting. She works at a fashion magazine.

  • Shared connections include both of our fathers apparently being tennis buddies.

  • We both share big ambitions and life goals. She loves to travel and is always going to different music festivals across the country. We both want to eventually get married, but are a no go on having kids.

  • Same music/fashion taste and turns out we both went to the same shows (but missed each other).

  • She is a carbon copy of my mother + me combined, personality-wise. She literally looks like a 24yo version of my mother. Perhaps why I'm interested? I love my goofy, yet ice cold mother.

NEGATIVES

  • She calls me out on the long hours I work and how I should take time to enjoy my life. She also calls me out on my lack of social media presence (I'm an intensely private person).

  • She admits that she dresses like a guy half of the time and is often misinterpreted to be mean/bitchy because she's very honest/blunt.

  • Given her career, it seems like she place a huge emphasis on external looks/beauty/makeup and prides herself of knowing X friend who works at Y company.

  • Somehow, the convo takes a turn to our exes. She mentioned her last ex couldn't handle her having a lot of guy friends (who she admits won't ever make a move on her -- haha sure).

  • She apparently knows my first ex and asked me if I lost my virginity to her at 15yo. WTF

  • She comments: "If I don't care about you or feel like you add to my life, I will not go out of my way to support you."

  • We both look at our phones throughout (me to check on work emails and her to apparently check her texts/Instagram). There were some 10-second silences where we both just looked into each other's eyes. READ: Strange.

  • When we leave the bar, she hugs me for 10 seconds longer than I hug her. She tells me: "You have my #, hit me up if you want to go to a show or something." READ: Strange again.

  • She texts the next morning: "Thanks for drinks last night! It was good seeing you!" I reply: "Hey, good to see you too. Next time won't be in 10 years." She replies: "Maybe 6 years? We'll decrease as we get older ha." READ: Bust

POSITIVES

  • In my opinion, not many besides her laughing at my jokes + exact same music/fashion taste.

  • Like me, she places a huge emphasis on loyalty and admits she's never cheated on her past exes and often supports her boyfriends too much. Ride or die? Maybe.

  • I tell her I may have to head back into work afterwards. She tells me, "If you have to go back to work, why didn't you pick a bar closer to your workplace?" Considerate? Maybe.

  • At one point, I tell her: "You probably think I'm an asshole." She replies: "No, if I did, I would've left already. So ARE you an asshole?" I reply: "Yeah, I was an asshole when we were kids, but I'm a more charismatic asshole now." She laughs.

LESSONS LEARNED

  • Keep frame at all times. She called me out on multiple things and I messed up by replying "fair point" and falling into her frame. She reiterates: "I'm not criticizing or attacking you, I'm just being honest and want to help you."

  • Approach every meeting with a chick as a date. Everything is a screening/test and you should both measure each other up.

  • Always have multiple options in the pipeline. I have 2 other girls I'm hanging with, but they just don't do it for me.

  • My friends/cousins tell me she's obviously joking around with her texts above^ and that I should continue to chase/shoot my shot. I just think of all the negatives above^ and feel it was a bust.

TL;DR: Had drinks with an old friend. She called me out on everything. I left feeling slightly aroused/on my toes, yet gut feeling is she's not interested. On to the next one.