Going solo questions/advice.

ackshunpact · 2014-04-12T04:56:14+00:00

Oakland is rough solo, haven't tried it in a while though. Lots of people about but very cliquey and lots of cockblocks. Lots of hotties too, it can be a lot of fun. But yes essentially i go out and try to make friends by being kind of outrageous and funny and loud. I try to find someone to jive off of, guy or girl (guy is easier) and now you aren't solo for a while.

If you're young enough hit up berkeley bars too. College girls everywhere.

Just remember be the most noticeable person in the venue, making everyone around you is having a ball. High energy, some people call it holding court. I often get cuties asking other people my name cuz they wanna come meet me. gl, oak-bro.

lilhurt38 · 2014-04-12T10:14:03+00:00

You go out solo and you go out often. To be honest, you will end up getting bored and you'll just start talking to random people if you go out enough. Going to bars isn't that fun unless you're interacting with someone else. This is what happened to me tonight. I went out salsa dancing cause I wanted to learn to salsa dance. I got bored with the music and went to the strip of bars right by campus. I couldn't find good music to dance to, so I spent a good amount of time just hanging out and not really approaching anyone. Later on I was getting bored, so I struck up a conversation with a girl sitting nearby. I honestly don't remember what I said. She immediately came closer to me and we started talking. Tons of IOIs and flirting. The bar started closing down, so I asked for her number. She gave it to me, we texted a little bit. It was clear that we're attracted to each other. I'll ask her to hang out on Sunday and I know that I can probably f close then. I tend to get good results when I go solo. You dont have to spend your night taking care of your friends. You're free to do whatever you want. The last few times I went out solo I made out with one girl within 5 minutes of meeting her and I got her number, I got hit on by a gay guy and went home with the girl he was hanging out with, and I got a number which is very likely to result in an f close later.

SamGill · 2014-04-12T12:11:26+00:00

I know that must sound like a dumb obvious question, but that's the situation I'm in. Something about that scene is so scary for me for some reason, even though I have almost no anxiety now during the day. Maybe because it's so foreign because i never was part of it.

there's no easy way to start, but to just do it. imagine jumping into a lake of icy cold water. it's a huge shock. but i think it's a good way to go about it. try asking 10 girls on the street for the time. do that for 10 days and then up the ante. google GLL approach anxiety program (Libertad). but after doing that for three weeks i said screw and just went with direct approaches. but that's not for everyone.

hmott3 · 2014-04-13T18:25:05+00:00

I go solo sometimes, started that way last night, then a friend ended up coming out. Here is what I found has helped some.

First I go later than I would with a group. At 9:00 its very slow and easy to see I'm alone and less people to meet in general. So I go more like 10:30. I start walking the street, smile on. Huge smile, way to big and forced! Its to change me not for anyone else. And hi and friendly to people I pass. Hi fives if they are high energy. Just getting my state up. Then I chat up the door guy and anyone in line with me. Just normal small talk in line stuff. Once in I do a lap around the place with a huge smile (It never left, that huge smile.. Not forced by now usually). and that look of 'I'm looking for my friends' on my face and movements. Sometimes I'll even open a set asking them to help me find my friend. I'll describe my friend to them, 6'5" white guy with a huge afro.. Really how can I not find him!

Usually by now I have 20-30 minutes of forcing a huge smile on my face. I have talked a bunch of moving sets on the street. I have been friendly in line and talked to the bouncer. I've opened a set or two in the bar. I'm generally in state and its 11:00 and the bar is crowded and its easy to open and have fun.

Just remember only the first few sets are hard. After that aa goes way down.

Title	Going solo questions/advice.
Author	pma2
Upvotes	0
Comments	8
Date	April 12, 2014 4:27 AM UTC (12 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/22u1w9/going_solo_questionsadvice/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/going-solo-questionsadvice.1369077 https://theredarchive.com/post/1369077

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