Hi machos. Today I'd like to share with you some things that go through my head as I challenge myself to become better at game and create my desired lifestyle.

Let me begin with telling you that in terms of look, I have a body that some of you would go gay for (fitness physique, face is ok). And I also experience a lot of AA. I'm fully aware of the fact that looks alone mean nothing, but it's just to give you perspective that even if you could do fitness photoshoots the next weekend, it doesn't boost your confidence if your brain plays against you (mine does but I'm working on making it work in my favor).

So I went out today to approach some women during the day but just couldn't fucking do it so I just took a walk and didn't approach a single woman.

Later during the day, I went to the gym and did my workout and at some point, I see my perfect 10. She's training and she definitely knows what she's doing which make me feel even more attracted to her since I like fit girls who are into fitness. So she trains close to me and it was only us two in the area so when she finished her set, I opened saying "I never seen a girl training so hard before" in a non-creepy way.

Now, the opener doesn't fucking matter. I can be creepy but this time I was cool and her resposne was just perfect. Her face lit up, she smiled and said "reaaaaly??!" and then I started saying some shit like "if I'd seen you on the streets, I'd never say you could train like that". She gave some reply while still being really positive and giggling and I kinda got back to my set and she did the same.

So yeah I did it. I opened a 10 in the gym and she was into that. I didn't stumble over my words and seem creepy etc. It was the simpliest thing in the world yet my brain usually makes it seem fucking tough and serves me countless excuses.

Here is the problem, she changed her location to do some other exercises and I kind of lost her because it's a huge gym. I knew how to continue the conversation further but I just didn't do it. I just forgot the abc, didn't chat with her some more and ask for a number.

I could beat myself up that I've lost a chance with an amazing girl but I do not give a shit tbf. I'm happy I just approached her. I'm at the point where if I just approach once a day, it's awesome. She was hot but when you live in a big city, the supply of hot women isn't an issue.

I watch a lot of RSD videos and they help me tremendously. I watched Tyler today and he was talking a lot about meditation and how he managed not to associate with his brain. I need to do the same in order to be successful with women. My brain doesn't naturally serve me well and I fully realize that, yet when I'm in field and it's time to take action, I kinda forget it.

My problem during the daygame is that I'm paralyzed that I'll be judged by people who see me approaching (it's like an internal blockade). That is my issue and I'm sure plenty of you guys experience the same. Watching puas like Tyler who used to be creepy as fuck and now tell what went through their heads and how they overcame it helps me a lot. I'm also at 10th day of journaling, meditation and no fap.

These three things are game-changers. In my opinion, nofap is where your PU journey starts. If you jerk off, you waste your energy, feel tired and depressed and also risk getting porn-related ED. So I decided to do no fap challenge starting at 12/02/2016 and I used journaling and meditation to help me in hard times.

My journals are the most disgusting thing in the world, they read like shit. But they're for myself. At the end of each day, I just write what's in my head, what I did, how I feel and felt, what I want to do tomorrow etc. I'm basically talking to myself, warts and all.

As for mediation, I meditate in the shower. For like half an hour. I just mentally disappear and let go of everything. Attachments, thoughts, concers. As I hear and feel the water, I imagine I'm in the amazon rainforest. As deep as it sounds, it actually awesome and I encourage you to meditate and research further topics like mindfullness, letting go etc. Meditation in the shower isn't the most evironmentally-friendly approach but I just felt in love with it and since my bills are included in the rent, I don't give a shit.

Can't wait to post my field reports soon when I go out there again and go for it.