I have really hard time understanding the concepts around AA I’m not a newb and have tried everything but still have to get drunk to approach consistently. I’ve done so many approaches AA Is still there and is still bad.

I think the main problem for me is this contradiction I can’t reconcile: if I’m supposed to get evidence that I will not die if I approach a woman, aren’t I therefore seeking a reaction.

And sure enough every time I consciously try to work on my AA I reaction seek and I’m reactive. But when I ignore it, it doesn’t go away, so what have I gotten wrong here?