I’ve been running into a few situations lately where I can’t really tell what’s going on socially, and instead of doing anything, I just kind of freeze and overthink it afterward.

The other day I was standing in line outside getting food with friends. I glanced behind me and noticed a girl looking in my direction. A bit later I heard her say something like “I’m so cold right now,” and when I looked back again she was still looking directly at me. I wasn’t sure if she was just cold and wanted to say it out loud, or if I should have responded in some way.

Another time I went to pick up glasses I had ordered online. The employee helping me wasn’t working on commission or anything like that. She complimented how the glasses looked on me and even asked to try them on herself. She also asked me a few personal questions like what I do and where I work. I told her I work at a sushi restaurant, and she mentioned she’d been wanting to try a new sushi place and said she might see me there. The interaction felt natural and friendly and that's why I didn't escalate it.

Then literally today, I was walking to class and a girl I’d never met made eye contact, smiled, and gave me a obvious wave as we passed each other. Hand up near her shoulder, fingers waving. Honestly I wasn't sure how to take that, because we've never had a convo before. But I kept walking.

In all of these situations, I feel like I hesitate too much and end up missing whatever the right move could have been.

How do I get better at reading moments like this in real time, and how do I get more comfortable just starting a conversation instead of freezing and overthinking it?