How do i get over this shitty feeling

IWriteForGroupies · 2016-07-26T11:56:22+00:00

I recommend staying away from her and terminating the friendship. Put as much distance between the two of you as possible.

TheXXL · 2016-07-26T12:35:57+00:00

Ok, let's summarize: You are friends with a girl you have feelings for, and she doesn't. You feel bad because of this, but you are still friends with her.

This begs the question: How many dates do you have? How many girls are you approaching? From what i read i get the feeling that the answer for both my questions will be "0", and this is the problem. You are focusing on her, making yourself unavailable for other women. Also what you feel is a mix of jealousy, low self worth, a feeling of being rejected for a lack of value and scarcity as in "no woman likes me, only she did, and now i have lost her...".

The best way to counter that feeling is to realize that there are so many women wanting someone like you in their lives, and are pretty much waiting for this to happen. You just have to move your ass and approach to find those women. The side effect of this is when you have dates with different women you will see how not special this one girl is, and that there are so many other great women out there. It also makes you realize that your value comes from withing, not from another person, and of course you will soon forget why you were so obsessed about her.

In other words: Go out, meet women, fuck them, profit from a oneitis free life.

taylortob · 2016-07-26T16:38:56+00:00

I'm in a similar situation as yourself, so here's what I have to say.

I totally understand what you're going through. It's not easy to get over someone you love. You feel the need to get back with her because you think it's the right decision, but you should ask yourself, "Have I ever felt like this with another person before?"

Chances are you probably have. You've probably been rejected before and you've probably had your expectations shut down by the girl you wanted the most. It happens though. Nothing is perfect, and that's something you need to accept.

You also need to accept that you are going to have these feelings. When you start having these negative emotions, accept it. Be aware that what you're feeling is normal and that it's not the end of the world. The more you try to avoid these feelings and thoughts and push them away, the stronger these feelings become. You're not accomplishing anything by avoiding these feelings and if you stop trying to control the feelings, you'll start to realize that you're fine.

I'm going through some pretty hard feelings right now as we speak with a girl I broke up with and it's difficult. She's with someone else now and it's hard to accept that. Maybe she might be available in the future, but should I wait until that happens? No. It's hard to tell yourself this, but moving on is seriously the best thing to do.

You're going to have these negative emotions, and you know what? You will get over it. Time will heal these wounds.

For now, you should avoid anything that brings you closer to her that you can change now. This means hiding or deleting her on social media, deleting text conversations or phone number, and avoiding person to person interactions with her only if it is reasonably possible. You don't have to switch schools or move to another country, but if you know where she works and lives, then find out what you can do to avoid going that way. This is going to help you move on. Trying to be friends with her right now is not a good idea and that's exactly what I did with my ex. We are both going our separate ways and that's okay. I don't have to feel hatred towards her nor do I need to explain anything to her.

You will be fine. Realize that this is normal. Meditate if it makes you feel better. Try working on yourself and doing things that you like to do to distract you from those feelings. Work on making yourself a better person and you will soon realize that she doesn't need to be there for you to be complete. Let go and stop controlling your feelings. Let them be, and be aware of these feelings. Notice that you are feeling this way and that it is normal. You're going to feel better in time, but dealing with your emotions is the first step to feeling better.

recyclablebanthas · 2016-07-27T03:42:03+00:00

ok so theres a girl we were kind of non platonic friendship i loved her i even confessed but she didnt want to be in relationship.

First of all, you seem to have some illusions here. You're describing a textbook situation where the girl is in friendship with a guy, the guy passes up his chance because he's afraid, then months or weeks later (too late), he gains enough comfort to try for something more. Long after the girl has moved on from considering it.

So this was not a "non-platonic friendship." It was a friendship. Period.

When you confessed, that was awkward. And she was apparently nice about it.

she's a great n very genuine person.So this happened for past 6 months. after that semesters got over our branch changed and some shit happened between so our friendship became complete platonic now -_- .

No. Unless you've left a LOT out here, like kissing her or sleeping with her or something, this was always platonic in the real world.

now i just cant seem to get over her....how do i get over this feelings this negative emotions ?

Right now you are wallowing in whatever images you had of this imaginary relationship you convinced yourself was forming, but wasn't.

You get over this by accepting the FACTs:

It was never more than friendship in the real world.
This being the case, you did not lose what you thought you lost. You didn't lose love. You lost an illusion. Which is good because now you have room in your life for something real.

Title	How do i get over this shitty feeling
Author	millionairesai
Upvotes	2
Comments	5
Date	July 26, 2016 10:55 AM UTC (10 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/4uo1tl/how_do_i_get_over_this_shitty_feeling/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/how-do-i-get-over-this-shitty-feeling.1410059 https://theredarchive.com/post/1410059

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