How do I keep from being too agreeable? Or should I say how do I disagree with a girl without it ruining the vibe?

recyclablebantha · 2013-04-13T05:56:06+00:00

Not. enough. information.

Long story short, disagreeing with a girl does not equal ruining the "vibe". If fact, disagreeing in a certain way (teasing, negging, whatever you want to call it), can ENHANCE the vibe.

All disagreeing has to mean is that you don't agree and that you have enough backbone and balls to share this.

All agreeing all the time does is actually ruin the vibe, more often than not.

Think about it: do YOU want to date a woman/girl who is a yes-man? Over time, it'll just seem like she has no mind of her own, she just says yes, yes, yes. The fun will dwindle and fade away. The fire will sputter and die. If it was there at all. Now realize that this sort of attitude appears to be your goal.

You seem to want to play it safe, but it's actually a waste of your time. If you voicing a disagreement would be enough to discover that you're not compatible with her...... that's actually a good thing and will save you from wasting time.

....I don't know how to tell them no without ruining the mood......if anyone has any suggestions I could use them.

But you seem to be asking for things to say in every situation. We can't give that to you. There is no one size fits all thing to say that magically won't offend someone. And we certainly can't give you endless comments for every situation.

No, what you ought to do here is work on yourself so that you're comfortable disagreeing with someone...... and realize that disagreeing by itself, is not bad, assuming that you're not being a dick about it. Simply disagreeing with someone is not being a dick. It can be playfully done, for example. But mostly, so long as you're not trying to simultaneously insulting them in some extreme way, you should be fine.

LAFAYETTELA · 2013-04-12T22:06:47+00:00

agree to disagree

tommygroove · 2013-04-12T22:39:21+00:00

Joke about it, go to the other extreme. Was just talking to a girl a few days ago who in my opinion, had horrible music taste. I just joked around comparing it to other bad music and saying how she should join me in something that involved good music.

TL;DR Disagree, but in a joking way that you can all agree on.

Seber · 2013-04-12T23:48:26+00:00

Agree (well, disagree) and amplify. Make some jokes about it and you should be fine. Also, you'll subcommunicate that you know what you want and don't let anyone stand in the way of it. Alpha as fuck.

CunningLanguageUser · 2013-04-13T20:10:59+00:00

Agreeing too much is actually dangerous itself.

I'd actually say there is little to lose in disagreeing, especially because it's so common for other men to do it. It also means when you do agree on something, it's much more meaningful.

Girls don't want you to change your behaviour for them, in fact it's disingenuous. Own your opinions, it's attractive.

If the question is more about how to do so smoothly, well this applies to everyone you meet in life.

You can be laid back and matter of fact about how you disagree, returning with probing Socratic logical questions to dismantle their position. Not sexy, but having the ability to make them think over their own position conveys intelligence and works well with women who value their own intellect, because then they know you have the ability to appreciate it.

That's not very PUA conventional though. Much less risky is to tease them over their opinion. You don't even have to say anything, just ask them their opinion back to them smirking, before pursing going '...ok'. You don't even need to say anything, but you've now playfully framed that their opinion in comparison to yours, which hasn't even been divulged yet, is outrageous. They'll usually start digging (hey, investment!) you to get your opinion and what's wrong with theirs. From here you're free to voice yourself.

You can also amplify. Anti-immigration? "Yeah, I totally, get them all back to Africa!" "No, that's not what I mean!" "It's OK, we can be White Power brothers together, here, lemme show you my tattoo", and so on.

You're not obliged to take life seriously.

Of course, the above mostly applies to opinions. If it's something like you should change clubs, you can just stand your ground (only if you don't want to obviously), and get the number before leaving it up to them if they depart. You can also take control of the situation by physically escalating or distracting in another way, until it seems inevitable it won't happen.

lol_user_frame · 2013-04-13T05:16:31+00:00

"oh that's so cute, my little sister thought so too."

6PoolPwnage · 2013-04-14T18:23:54+00:00

Girl: I like turtles.

You: Uhm, nah turtles kind of remind me of lazy ass stoners. Does this mean you're secretly a stoner?!

It's not what you say, it's how you say & deliver.

AlwaysLateToThreads · 2013-04-14T18:35:14+00:00

Just state your honest opinion and disagree. Women don't like guys that agree with everything just to agree they can tell.

Title	How do I keep from being too agreeable? Or should I say how do I disagree with a girl without it ruining the vibe?
Author	Nebula829
Upvotes	5
Comments	9
Date	April 12, 2013 9:10 PM UTC (13 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/1c8co6/how_do_i_keep_from_being_too_agreeable_or_should/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/how-do-i-keep-from-being-too-agreeable-or-should-i.1350489 https://theredarchive.com/post/1350489

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