How do I make more friends?

ProphetVA · 2012-05-03T16:49:12+00:00

One of the commonly missed keys to building a social circle is to be the guy who introduces everyone to everyone else. Even if you just met some people from group A, introduce them as if they were your good friends when you merge them with group B. Try to remember one interesting detail about the people you meet, so as you introduce them you can intro them. This makes it appear as if you just know everybody, which will drive your social value through the roof as people see you do it over and over. If you have friends in bands, or who do interesting shows or events, get into the habit of inviting people out to them. Introduce the people you bring (even if you only just met them) to the people who are doing the show. Throw BBQs and parties or come up with excuses to go to a park and smoke a J. It's actually amazing how quickly you can become the centre of a social circle simply by being the glue that holds together several other separate social circles. If you're just getting started, meet some girls and friend-zone them. Girls want to be around guys who aren't threatening and lead them to a good time (they want good emotions and fun!). As social circle will always be more accepting if you have cool girls with you, and men will just flock to you simply because you have girls that they don't.
That's the high-level social game. On the more personal level, take interest in people. Remember details, ask questions, appreciate and understand the people you are talking to. Most people want someone they can talk to about things they like, while feeling that the other person UNDERSTANDS them. If you master that, you will be amazed by how much people will like you and WANT to hang out with you. Also, have some cool interests and hobbies and clean up your place so that it's inviting and comfortable.

2012-05-03T10:43:48+00:00

I don't have a solid answer to this one, but I can tell you how I made a shit-ton of friends on accident. I was on deployment in Iraq and because of my job I worked alone mostly but on the same schedule with one other guy. I didn't like him very much as we didn't have anything in common, but he was the only one around. After a few months the guy grew on me, and though I thought he was kinda dumb and was interested in boring things, he was the kind of guy everyone loved.

After the deployment we didn't talk until I got a divorce, (about 3 months later.) He invited me out with his friends. He was the kind of guy who always makes friends with everyone he meets. After several months of fumbling around in the group, I made some very close friends.

I guess my only advice on this is find someone who has a lot of friends and befriend them. Model yourself after them. It's not much, but no one else has answered so far.

az3r132 · 2012-05-03T11:30:23+00:00

Man its a lot like women really. Stop needing it. Focus on you and self amuse. Get a project, a life purpose and become that person. I have always had really good success observing something and making a joke. Don't make friends with people who don't have common interests either.

kidweapon · 2012-05-03T16:30:46+00:00

I don't want to be that guy who always references material to read/ listen to but there's a really good podcast interview that was done on pickuppodcast which directly answers your issue. There is a bit of fluff in the interview but it makes for an interesting story and I suggest you make your whole way through it because there is some great stuff to learn.

The really cool thing in this interview that I found was how he talks about moving your relationship from 1-on-1 to introductory rapport. Basically he addressed the issue of how it's easy to get good rapport with someone 1-on-1 in person but it's rather difficult to get onto the next level where that person will start introducing you to the people that they know and he gives great advice on how to make that transition which seems to be the exact problem that you're having.

2012-05-03T16:29:59+00:00

I think the problem is, any cool guy or girl has no interest in having more friends

This really isn't true. Most really popular cool guys are always making new contacts and friends and networking. Thing is, they probably don't want to be friends with you since you bring, admittedly, nothing to the table. You don't know a bunch of cool people or chicks an dont have contacts etc.

bigweiner · 2012-05-04T07:12:35+00:00

Join stuff. What's something every experience making new friends has in common? You weren't not doing anything lol.

Looks like you're in college, I'd join some kind of intramurals or get involved in some organizations, might look good on your resume or something. Looks like you've got the "how to be friendly" down. Put yourself in some situations where you'll meet new people. Organizations are a lot more likely place to make a friend than a club.

Title	How do I make more friends?
Author	wlav
Upvotes	6
Comments	8
Date	May 3, 2012 9:08 AM UTC (14 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/t4uod/how_do_i_make_more_friends/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/how-do-i-make-more-friends.1332162 https://theredarchive.com/post/1332162

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