how do i overcome blushing when approaching girls?

smartgig · 2012-11-09T09:35:18+00:00

[permanently deleted]

shake_n_bake_n · 2012-11-09T17:37:10+00:00

So, I went through a really bad blushing stage not that long ago. It was actually one of the weirdest things, because I never blushed before. Please keep in mind that I'm 23 and this was a couple years ago. At the time, I had never experienced this before. Thing was, it was such an embarrassing experience to me that after it happened once, it would not stop and anything would trigger it.

And when I say bad, I mean real bad. And it wasn't just girls either, it was everyone. I actually could not directly talk to people at work because I could already feel myself beginning to blush and would sprint for an exit. This is not an exaggeration, and this problem persisted for at least a couple weeks.

Ok, so what did I do? Well, I read up on it online. The weird thing about blushing is it feels like it's so out of the control. And that's what really makes it worse. It starts with a trigger (a girl, a crowd, a speech, etc), after the trigger this uncontrollable feeling overcomes you, a little tingling maybe or a feeling of heat.. and then bam! Here it comes, and you know what it is. Crap, I hate this. I wish it would just stop. What can I do? Nothing. You haven't been able to stop it before, why would you now? You can't. You never could. You're not in control.

But... wait a minute, of course you can. Who's doing this to you? You are! If there's one thing you're in control of it's you. So take it back! It's right in front of you. Stare the blushing right in the face and breath. Nice, slow, controlled, deep breaths. You're in control now. And you don't want to blush anymore.

Here's a fun trick: try to make yourself blush when you're alone. Sounds weird right? Just try it. Yea, that's right, it's impossible. You can't do it. Now take this concept and try to force yourself to blush in front of girls. But don't just let the blushing take control by itself. Really try to make yourself blush. Focus on making yourself blush and I believe you'll find yourself in an odd sense of control.

budguy68 · 2012-11-09T14:56:07+00:00

Accept yourself for the way you are and just go with it. Sometimes the more you fight something the worst it becomes. Actually when I was newer to this I would also blush and act shy and shit. Girls would find that shit 'cute'. Now that I am don't have any nerve issues so I sometimes come of as a sleazy cocky car sales man when approaching women so I am going back to being more sincere.

Say exactly whats going on.. "lol.. thats making me blush.. but thank you..." (just say 'thank you' for your default responds for any compliment)

pickup_sticks · 2012-11-09T17:12:10+00:00

Just acknowledge. "Aw, gee, you're making me blush" (bug smile)

Girls like knowing that you're attracted to them. It's okay to be vulnerable. Just don't act needy.

2012-11-09T10:52:52+00:00

Im thinking that its not so bad. At least the girl knows why you are there. It also shows that you have the capabilities to overcome the feeling which causes blushing which is quite prominent. Its no small feat. Just do your best to keep your cool and remember that its not really a bad thing if you dont let it consume you. Hell, if you do it and make a comeback then it might be quite cute. x)

On the same note, if you receive a compliment the way I approach it is to say "thank you" and then go on to compliment them or do something more cocky and say "I know, its pretty fucking awesome" as long as you arnt too cocky about it.

2012-11-09T16:18:45+00:00

I blush all the fucking time. In fact my cheeks are naturally redish half the time. All I can say is that it will go away with time. When you get more comfortable approaching you will just stop blushing. Do you know what I did while I still blushed? Nothing. It does not matter. It does not make you less of a person. You react to chicks, so what? Actually I have an example for you. Do you know this duche? Not only he is a nobend he also has rosy cheeks and he blushes all the time. He does not have any problems getting laid though.

Smokey_McPCP · 2012-11-09T17:29:16+00:00

How old are you? I ask because I, too, blushed very easily in those oh so awkward early teens.

dking168 · 2012-11-09T18:39:03+00:00

The reason you blush is because you are inexperienced. When you get blown out enough times or approach enough, the problem will solve itself. Some women like confident men, some find it cute that you are stumbling over your words, I have had both situation and as I said, the best situation is you going to the subreddit 100sets and Go. Don't think.

Thunderbuttocks · 2012-11-09T19:22:11+00:00

"Thank you, your mouth makes nice compliments."

ThrowawayPUA · 2012-11-09T21:21:41+00:00

This comes up often in seddit and I usually recommend guys check with a doctor to see if there is a physical cause. Rosacea is a fairly common skin condition that causes excessive blushing and flushing. It is easily treatable but you should see a dermatologist for a diagnosis since most general practitioners don't recognize it. I have rosacea and I blushed a lot and got really red, but that is pretty much under control now, I just apply a prescription skin gel once a day. If you have rosacea, you really should get it treated because it just gets worse over time.

I also recommend trying some meditative techniques to reduce your reactiveness. It is sort of like biofeedback. You learn to recognize your heightened reaction and relax before it runs away. It's sort of hard to explain.

Attila_TheHipster · 2012-11-10T00:33:02+00:00

Warmup sets!

smartgig · 2012-11-09T14:46:33+00:00

I think you should stop being a "nice guy". There're some books and movies available regarding this issue.

Title	how do i overcome blushing when approaching girls?
Author	blushman
Upvotes	30
Comments	17
Date	November 9, 2012 9:11 AM UTC (13 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/12wmxs/how_do_i_overcome_blushing_when_approaching_girls/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/how-do-i-overcome-blushing-when-approaching-girls.1342516 https://theredarchive.com/post/1342516

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