How to date

alexalmighty100 · 2026-03-03T12:35:15+00:00

The only way to bridge the gap is to make a move. Start your dates with a hug and if you walk to the restaurant or wherever you’re going for the date, hold her hand on the way.

You’ve got a third date so you know she likes you and you both know your intentions so no need to panic just wait until you both have a nice moment during your date and suggest you guys go back to yours or somewhere private and you’ll know what to do

Back2theCouture · 2026-03-03T13:20:01+00:00

I can’t seem to shift the mood of the conversation from “a meeting between two people who like each other” to “a meeting that leads so sex”

You need a catalyst.

Most people need to bond first before they get intimate, sometimes it takes months or even years. Slowly build up their emotional and physical connection over time.

But that process can be done much more quickly within weeks or even days. This is why people do verbal and physical escalation. Don’t just treat her as a friend as she might put you in a friend zone. But treat her like your gf as if you’ve already had sex with her; give her a hug whenever you see her, playfully mess with her hair, hold her hand while walking, casually kiss her cheek.

This is also why women always say “there’s no spark/chemistry”. Of course there’s not, because the convo feels bland, the guy just keeps throwing her interview-style questions, no “you and me” convo, and he treats her like a friend, not even dare to touch her shoulder or hand.

Long8D · 2026-03-09T04:19:59+00:00

Yeah the touching thing is definitely a big part of it but it's not just that.

The shift from two people who like each other to this is going somewhere tonigh happens through physical escalation and tension, not really conversation. You can have the best chat in the world and still go home alone because you never created that charge between you. Words don't usually do that, touch does. The things you say over dinner or coffee will likely be forgotten, but the feeling you create will be remembered.

And touch needs to start from the very beginning not when you're an hour in and trying to figure out how to make a move. If you spend the whole date building comfort through words and then suddenly introduce physical contact later it feels out of place and out of nowhere to her. It needs to be woven in from the moment you sit down so that by the time things are supposed to escalate it already feels completely normal for you two to be in each other's space.

Start small so like touch her arm when you're making a point, sit closer than you need to, hold eye contact a beat longer than feels comfortable. None of it is a big move but it stacks up and by the time the date is an hour in she's already used to you being physical and the escalation feels natural rather than like a sudden gear shift.

The other thing is tension and lot of guys who are naturally not touchy feely try to compensate by being really fun and friendly and the date ends up feeling like hanging out with a cool new friend. Tease her a bit, disagree with her on something small, let there be a moment of silence without rushing to fill it. Comfort is good but too much comfort with zero tension is what gets you the you're a nice friend hug at the end of the night which rlly isn't want you're going for

Also one of those girls literally already told you she was down before the date. She wasn't going to make it happen for you though because that's not how it works usually. She told you, now you had to actually escalate and make it happen and you didn't. Don't expect them to close for you even when they've basically handed it to you.

And logistics matter too so where are you taking them? Sitting across from each other at a loud bar makes intimacy almost impossible so think of some spots to sit side by side maybe a quieter spot somewhere you can actually be close to each other makes everything easier.

Don't waste your time just talking on these days push your boundaries a little

Title	How to date
Author	IronNeo97
Upvotes	0
Comments	6
Date	March 3, 2026 12:16 PM UTC (4 months ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/1rjnsif/how_to_date/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/how-to-date.1574625 https://theredarchive.com/post/1574625

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