how to get over this 'fear'?

IronManSeduction · 2016-11-09T03:57:45+00:00

Hey juskeepinitreal,

Fear of success and fear of failure is rooted in the same fear: The fear that you won't be able to handle what comes after

We're not really afraid of someone saying no to us. Those are just words. What we're really afraid of is that we don't know how we're going to handle the rejection after.

We're afraid of what other people will think. We're afraid of awkwardly seeing them again. We're afraid we might feel worthless after.

Same thing with the fear of success. We're afraid we might not live up to her expectations. We're afraid we might be ousted as a fraud. We're afraid we lack the ability to be a partner.

Here's the thing: You will never truly know whether you are capable of handling it until you give yourself a chance to do it.

So, give yourself a chance.

awkwardtoy13 · 2016-11-08T22:43:37+00:00

You're overthinking it. Relax. Think of her as a potential friend. Go on a date, kino, escalate, get in bed with her. Then if you enjoy each others company you can continue going on dates and hanging out.

Honestly that's all a relationship is. You're friends, but you have the added benefits of sex, trust, and someone to share things with.

throwitawayagainyay · 2016-11-09T03:08:16+00:00

Yo man. Same thing here. Literally happened just now. Beautiful conversation, but as soon as she asks for MY number I freak out and say something really mean without even thinking about it. Like wtf brain. She stops saying anything. I just say sorry that was mean. I asked a girl out over text the other day (different girl) but I am dreading that she says yes. She hasn't replied yet and I hope she never does.

I have no idea wtf is going on. But I feel you. It's this fear of success . And it's hard to describe.

My personal opinion of it is I don't actually like this girl (any of them). I even asked myself if I was gay. But I don't think so. I'm forcing myself because I feel like I have to now that I started. And I'm trying to drop it any way I can.

I have been looking into this as well. If you want a pseudoscience answer, there is a book by Vadim Zeland you can find on youtube (series of audiobooks) where he describes this perfectly. He calls it "doors." So, this is hard to describe, but basically if you are really close to getting what you want, but at the very end it suddenly falls apart, then it was never YOUR door that your soul wants to enter. (Think matrix where Neo is entering all those random doors he doesn't want to be in). So your soul or possibly even the forces of the universe stop you and you were never meant to have that thing. If you are feeling that scared feeling it's your soul trying to tell you WRONG DOOR. Don't proceed. If it's right for you, you will sail through so easily you won't even notice.

Title	how to get over this 'fear'?
Author	JusKeepinItReal
Upvotes	1
Comments	3
Date	November 8, 2016 10:38 PM UTC (9 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/5bwi5t/how_to_get_over_this_fear/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/how-to-get-over-this-fear.1415248 https://theredarchive.com/post/1415248

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