How to take the next step?

DaygameCode · 2025-01-19T14:44:08+00:00

If you put the filter on, you end up being forgettable. It’s better to offend them and be remembered than to play it safe and be forgotten.

Playing it too nice or filtering yourself to avoid any risk of offending someone dilutes your personality and makes you blend in with the countless others who are too afraid to stand out, making you forgettable. You simply can’t attract girls this way even if you say nothing that could upset them.

You know what the worst type of conversation is when talking to women and yet one of the most commonly used?

Nice weather huh? Do you come here often? What do you do for work? Any plans for this weekend? Can i get your number?

This type of generic small talk goes nowhere, yet it’s one of the most commonly used approaches. Conversations about the weather, work, or weekend plans might feel “safe,” but they fail to create any emotional spark or deeper connection.

Why? Because they’re forgettable, predictable, and lack the tension or intrigue that generates attraction. A woman doesn’t walk away from small talk thinking, “Wow, he’s different.” Instead, she’ll likely forget the interaction altogether.

What works better is focusing on emotions, curiosity, and playful flirting. Ask questions or make comments that lead to a story, a laugh, or a feeling. For example:

Instead of “How was your day?” try “_What’s the most exciting thing you did month, other than meeting me of course?_” (Doesn’t matter if she thinks that’s arrogant, don’t filter yourself)
Instead of saying where she is from, you could say omg i would never date women from (her country), she might say why? with a tone that suggests she got a bit offended, and then you flip it by saying “because i heard women from there are heartbreakers, charming, gorgeous and imposible to forget 😏”

Conversations that evoke emotions and stand out will make you memorable and keep her engaged than trying to filter yourself, diluting your personality to become yet another robot from the list of identical robots that approached her, all of whom she forgot, almost immediately, after parting ways.

If you have to choose between leaving a girl indifferent, and getting her upset. Better to leave her upset. Obviously things are not black and white, you don’t have to choose between making her upset and indifference, the point in making is switch your mindset from avoiding risk, to embracing boldness.

Indifference is the death of attraction because it means you’ve made no impact at all. While upsetting her isn’t the goal, stirring emotions—whether it’s intrigue, curiosity, or even playful frustration-keeps the interaction alive and memorable.

Women are drawn to men who evoke feelings, not to those who try to tiptoe around everything in an attempt to be “perfect.”

When you focus on being authentic and unapologetic, you naturally stand out because you’re not afraid of rejection or disapproval. This doesn’t mean being intentionally rude or offensive—it means being confident enough to express yourself without filtering your thoughts to please her.

The reality is, emotions, whether positive or slightly challenging, keep you in her mind.

Remember, attraction thrives on tension, not comfort. Don’t be afraid to disrupt the smooth flow of conversation if it means sparking a real connection.

Western-Month-3877 · 2025-01-19T16:10:00+00:00

It’s ok to be embarrassing. 99% chance I would say your first moves would be embarrassing. So what? People fail and learn. Making an embarrassing move is better than not making one at all.

Ignore those girls, they laugh because they’re not on the receiving end. I’ve seen girls making their moves, they’re not any better than men sometimes even worse. They’re like sports spectators who think they know better so they make negative comments all the time, tell them to play too then you see how awkward they are. Just look at that shit on dating app where women need to open first. Lame and awkward openings from many of them. They want you to be Ronaldo or LeBron James when they don’t even play sports.

So instead of asking “how to take the next step” aka find a perfect move, I would just suggest make a usual move. Say hi, ask her name, introduce yourself, have a small talk, and see from there. If she responds well then you can go further by asking for her number and tell her you’d like to talk with her more. No bombastic openings, no “as seen on TV” moves. Just a regular conversation between 2 individuals.

Prestigious_Water336 · 2025-01-19T16:32:04+00:00

I just always say we'll you seem pretty cool. Can I grab your number real quick? Then you can text her back that same night to meet up for drinks or dinner.

Or you can just say "I'd love to take you out sometime. When are you free next?"

Don't overcomplicated it.

Dandys3107 · 2025-01-20T11:40:48+00:00

Technically you don’t need to deal with any kind of explanation or clever motives. Simply suggest doing some activities together. If girl approves such opportunity, where you can potentially make your moves and spend time one on one, it’s a very good sign of her interest, you don’t need to involve feelings or get any clearance, create opportunities, escalate your intimacy step by step and let the girl simply let you or not let you do it.

Title	How to take the next step?
Author	Warm-Perception-3437
Upvotes	3
Comments	4
Date	January 19, 2025 2:23 PM UTC (1 year ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/1i4ziye/how_to_take_the_next_step/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/how-to-take-the-next-step.1541577 https://theredarchive.com/post/1541577

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