After years of having no confidence or self-esteem... and studying PUA videos and 'how to get girls' material... I got the hang of it.

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My confidence went up. My charm got ridiculously good. People like talking to me. Girls find me attractive.

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But - there's a problem... It turns out I have a "game mode."

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I have a couple of friends (girls and guys) who told me they observed this around me. For some reason when I meet new people or when I'm talking to girls I'm an exaggerated version of myself. They said it wasn't necessarily a bad thing, but that my personality comes across strong and I get cockier.

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It's not that I become a douche. I'm a nice guy. But they said that it can turn off people who are insecure (aka - my confidence makes them uncomfortable) and it makes me come across like a fuckboy / player vibe (aka - too sure of himself).

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Normally I'm a chill guy and relatively relaxed when I'm around people I know. But I wasn't aware until people pointed it out that it's almost like I turn on a "switch" in certain social situations.

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Any advice on turning off "game mode"?

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I hate it when girls call me a player. And it makes sense now why on social media (where I supposedly also turn on "game mode" in my videos) girls don't give me the time of day. But when I meet them randomly in person and I don't consciously try to impress them, they're always like 'wow I didn't think you'd be this cool.'

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How do I turn off "game mode"?

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For more context - my theory as to why I turn it "on" is because I feel if I don't make a good impression people aren't going to like me. Or that they'll think I'm not a fun and confident guy. Obviously I still have some validation seeking tendencies in me.

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How do I strip off the game layer... and hone in who I really am... at ALL times?

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And I repeat... when I turn on "game mode" it's not like I become a douche. People who don't know me love it when they first meet me. But obviously I'm starting to realize it's making me come across way too egotistical and cocky. And girls aren't liking that energy.