Any idea what my issue is and what's the solution? I want to make a change:

  1. I'll meet a girl
  2. I'm typically not that interested but really like hanging out/hooking up with girls and getting to know them etc
  3. we will go out (and usually hook up within) 1-2 dates
  4. then I reduce contact by 75% and wait like 1-2 weeks before even trying to schedule plans with her (still text/call but much less than before because I know I won't wife her so ultimately she's a waste of my time but for some reason I'm not evolved enough to just outright end it with her)...
  5. then she does some sort of combo of stop texting me back, not wanting to hang out, etc... and it becomes all I can think about and I fight to get her back...
  6. then I get her back (sometimes) and I'm like eh I'm not even sure if I want to go out with her now...

Recent example:
Meet girl at bar. Get #. Go on a date, bring her back to mine, hook up... I text her some after but drop contact for 5 days... then hit her up again... ask her out... she says yes... then she cancels on me saying she feels like I was just using her and don't really care about her so she doesn't want to waste her time and possibly get her feelings hurt with me... and I ended up focusing a lot on her so I tried to get her back... called her to explain... she said she'd go out with me again... and now I still want to go see her but I'm like "eh if I see her cool. If not, cool". It's so dumb.

Any idea what my issue is?

Background on me:
I'm 31 yrs old; live in a big city; have lots of options but rarely do I have "gf material" options (when I do I know it and 100% focus on her and try my best and don't do the above); I think I'm a great catch (good job, house, friends, when I go out I can fairly easily get 1-5 numbers, have a lot of hot girls on dating sites etc); have very strong game imo

I'm wondering if it's an ego thing? Like I just want the option of them because maybe deep down I don't think I'm good enough? I don't think this is the case....
Or maybe it's because I have a lot of very important things to do in my life and I use this as my entertainment and distraction from that? Like I should start studying for the CFA but I'm like "I need to get a gf and will only get one by going out and putting myself out there a lot" so I don't allocate my time properly

I'm really not sure but I do this ALL the time... like I'll get a hot girls number, or a girl who's a pretty good catch but I wouldn't gf her... and if she ends up fizzling on me I end up focusing on it a lot more than I should. A big part of me wants to get a gf so I stop all this nonsense (I'd definitely prefer one but I am very selective) because this has been going on with me for years and I'm finally realizing it's just a huge waste of my time but I don't know why I continue to do it