For the most part I tend to be relatively aloof unless I find a girl I really vibe with. I would generally fuck it up by being too aloof or too engaged. Both of which are almost not even myself, nearly affected states of "shoulds."

By "shoulds" I mean I don't feel what I should say or do, I tend to simply think it out. When I get too heady I lose my natural state of aloofness. I think too much about what I should text her at that very moment, or how I should call her instead of simply acting in a more honest manner.

This is going to be a particularly difficult habit to break. I came to this realization about my mode of engagement due to an encounter last night with a girl I parted ways with recently. It took effort to get her to come and meet up, and whenever I rationalized why she should meet up with me it didn't work. In the end, the way she and I met up was because I felt like calling her, not thought of it.

She told me about another guy she has interest in. I am not going to have any of that. I don't want to be caught in a love triangle. I am going to disengage.

I know there isn't much I can attain from interacting with her at this point. I am going to take what I can from the interaction (the realization regarding my aloofness) and move on.