So I met this girl (29, I’m 50) who was hanging out with my next door neighbors. She initiated a short conversation & I went on my way. Saw her a couple more times & we would always chat briefly. I just bought a new car that I was spending a lot of time working on so she would often see me working on it in the parking lot & would come over to talk. She started talking to me more and gave me her number & we started texting also. Sounds good right? Then I got shingles. We hung out the night I got back from the hospital & partied, drinking and smoking & got pretty messed up. She was being flirtatious, touching my back and face and sitting up against me. I saved her from walking (or falling) into my aquarium by grabbing her & she doesn’t seem to mind. But she pulls back when I put my hand on her thigh. I’m thinking maybe she’s just messed up and I don’t want to be “me too’d” so I let it go. She stayed for awhile then went home.

We keep talking, hanging out and partying and she stops hanging out with the neighbors. I start giving her rides to and from her house at her request even though it’s only 3 blocks away. I drive a ‘73 Chevelle so I figured she just wants to ride in a hot car. She starts giving me hello & goodbye hugs & being flirtatious but she acts like she wants nothing else. I notice that she never brings any party favors so I introduce her to my guy, and ask him to tell me if she calls. She never does. She also tells me she has a curfew (she lives with her parents), often midnight, and I later find out it’s self-made. She starts hanging out past that sometimes, either at her discretion or my request. Still no further action. I’m getting suspicious and start being too busy for her when I’m not. She (I suspect) starts doing the same. Finally I get tired of always supplying the fun & tell her so. I call her & act somewhat asshole-ish. She takes it and now she’s acting super nice. Walks to my place and home in the snow and ice. She brings a bag of Nerds candy. That’s her contribution? Yep. Her name changes slightly on her Netflix account which she gave me the password to. I decide to stop giving her rides & start giving her only shotguns to smoke. She’s hesitant at first, then not. She’s always telling me she “had a great time last night” but still no action, though still being flirtatious. She’s always wanting to see me. I have to move but I’m still frequently in the neighborhood & often pick her up to go smoke in the car. We go to the air park on a few occasions, which I’ve done with other girls & it always ended up in a make out session, but this time it doesn’t happen. Then she tells me that we are friends and nothing more. No more shotguns, at her request. Says she doesn’t like it.

Then she texts me on a rainy day & wants to hang out. I tell her my car leaks so she’d “probably get wet but not in a good way”. She laughs and I ask her “are you laughing because it’s funny or because it’ll never happen?” She says because it’s funny. I say “if I thought you were interested I’d take that as a good sign. But at least you have a good sense of humor.” Reply: “lol I know right.” I ask her why she doesn’t have someone (she’s fun & really pretty). Says she has a boyfriend in Mexico she sees once or twice a year. Gets upset when I broach the subject. We plan to hang out again & I tell her (jokingly, I thought) “but just so there’s no misunderstanding, I want to make it crystal clear. ‘We’re just friends. That’s it. Nothing more.’”Which is exactly what she told me at the air park the last time. She says “yes of course.” I didn’t go pick her up and haven’t heard from her since.

I’m thinking it’s one of two things: 1) either she wanted me to make a move & I blew it, Or: 2) she was using me to provide drugs & drink

What do you think?

Edit: should read “Is she into me or using me?” No “m l”. That would make no sense. And some grammatical errors.