Just couldn't muster the courage (HELP)

CompetitionFair7686 · 2021-10-04T10:09:08+00:00

Shy? Afraid of rejection? Of making a fool of yourself in front of her or other people? Worried about what will people think?

The problem lies in your ego, your fear of what others might think of you, and how others will value you.

You are worried of doing something that others would consider weird, or worried making a fool of yourself and being laugh at, or getting a bad reaction from women.

All of that comes down to the same problem, which is that you want to protect your ego.

Your ego is like an invisible monster living inside your head, i like to picture it as Gollum from lord of the rings.

Your ego, or your Gollum is always whispering in your ear and controlling your behaviour. Your ego makes you act in ways that won’t cause damage to him.

Hence why you freeze, it is your ego that makes you freeze because it’s controlling you. Gollum is controlling you and you are his main ally.

The thing you need to understand about Gollum (your ego) is that he is not your friend. He is your main enemy.

And yes it’s all in your head, but you need to be aware of your enemies in order to realise you have to defeat them.

The key thing here is, that your ego is worried about protecting your image, or your sense of pride or sense of value. He wants to look cool, attractive, wants to fit in with other cool people, and not be perceived as inferior to others… The problem is that this needs are all bullshit and actually damage your life.

Ego just wants you to take yourself too seriously, he can’t allow you to have fun, he can’t allow you to laugh at yourself, all he is worried is that you fit in with the cool people or to be seen as valuable person that others value.

Therefore rejection is your ego’s worst fear because that goes against his needs of gaining people’s approval.

You need to choose to not attend to his needs, you need to choose to not give a fuck about protecting your image, you need to just say fuck you Gollum, i don’t care about appearing cool… You are, but not me. Because i prefer to laugh at myself and take myself less seriously.

Saying hi how are you to random women won’t work until you choose to be ok with rejection, until you choose to be ok with the fact that some girls won’t like you and that some girls might even think you are weird for talking to them or be disgusted by your attempts at interacting with them, and that’s ok.

That the world goes on, your life goes on and nobody will care months from now about that time you got rejected in a cruel manner. You yourself won’t even feel pain years from now, because pain is temporary.

Heck if you learn to just take yourself less seriously you won’t even feel pain if a rejection happens.

I do get rejected sometimes and i just congratulate the woman for her creativity in rejecting me, because i just don’t choose to take it personal.

Her rejection enters my ear and leaves through the other ear. I don’t let it affect me and I don’t see her rejection as something that defines my worth or who I am, because it doesn’t.

Things can only affect you if you choose to take them personal.

Every time someone rejects me I celebrate it, because it means my ego just took a huge beat, and that’s a step further to get rid of his influence, because a defeated ego teaches me to be humble and when you are humble nothing can affect you.

MmmNeapolitan · 2021-10-04T15:11:58+00:00

Overcoming your fear is the hardest part of seduction. It's what I struggle with the most. For some reason, we are wired to protect our image even if it is detrimental. Every guy has been there. Something that helps me is to have the same mentality as when I go to the gym. I don't give a shit about anyone there and they don't give a shit about me so why be nervous or afraid to look stupid? The reward is much, much greater than any risk. And the same goes for gaming. Think about it like this; even if you make a fool of yourself 1000 times, wouldn't it be worth it to fuck a 10? Or just to fuck at all? So shoot your shot, and learn from your experiences.

MidnightNinja627 · 2021-10-04T09:01:08+00:00

Force yourself to do it. Save yourself the regret next time. You’ll feel happier for putting yourself out there. You could’ve had a lady to go shopping with you and you missed out because you psyched yourself out.

I don’t mean to sound like I’m blaming you here, but you have the power to create these connections. You making excuses is you stopping yourself from doing so.

Think about that

gbizzle2 · 2021-10-04T09:45:08+00:00

Stop worrying about stupid "pickup" Stop waiting until you see an attractive woman before you decide to speak.

Next time speak to the old lady at the freezer.

Speak to the fat black guy looking for chips

Speak to the hispanic lady grabbing toilet paper

Speak to the average looking chick looking for ground beef.

Speak to the cashier.

If you cannot immediately figure out some interests you have in common based on appearance. Or you have a legit question for the person then you have no business talking to them.

Title	Just couldn't muster the courage (HELP)
Author	Nice_Panic
Upvotes	3
Comments	7
Date	October 4, 2021 8:41 AM UTC (4 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/q11hye/just_couldnt_muster_the_courage_help/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/just-couldnt-muster-the-courage-help.1274992 https://theredarchive.com/post/1274992

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