Just random questions

axe122 · 2020-10-02T00:58:33+00:00

If she dumps her emotional baggage on you once in a while will happen. You don’t want her to dump her emotional baggage on you since your not her therapist. If she does once in a while and your in a relationship is okay just listen and don’t try to solve her problems unless she asks for your opinion on it. Chances are she just wants to vent

If she’s just seeking validation from you you’ll know when she only wants to talk when she wants to talk and doesn’t ever seem to wanna meet or do anything in person.

You shouldn’t be texting her all day everyday anyway and most validation seeking comes when you over validate her she loses interest but wants to sorta keep you as a backup.

In the nfl if a teams qb gets hurt long term they’ll usually play the backup for a game or two but they are looking for ways to get a new starter long term. Basically when a girl seemed like she really liked you and maybe even went on a date with you but suddenly backs off and talks with you just enough that you feel hopeful your her back up at this point. The only way you can avoid this is be clear in your intentions from the start, not over validate her and if she’s not making an effort to hang out with you move on. Most over validation happens in text and on first dates by over complimenting her. Good luck

Michiru18 · 2020-10-02T02:18:08+00:00

I’m guilty for this but from my experience i did it to just really vent out, chicks are confusing and sometimes they just gotta get whatever it is thats weighing on their chest ya know? If it were me id just want you to listen and understand.
It starts with the persons self-esteem (or lack of it), this is where “getting to know the person” plays its role, youll start to see the signs when u get to know the persons personality a bit more.

👌🏼👌🏼👌🏼

GoldSmith64 · 2020-10-02T06:23:01+00:00

I mean this is pretty much exactly how I broke up with my friend recently so yeah giving someone your needy emotional baggage without there consent is one of the dumbest things anyone can do in my experience

thedarkseducer · 2020-10-02T17:06:26+00:00

I have two perspectives on this depending on the unique circumstances. Don’t be her emotional tampon. This will give off “gay male best friend” energy. She has friends for that. She will lose attraction to you. Unless you’re planning a seduction campaign. The key is to not let her unload, take her away from that negative energy, be a source of pleasure. Another perspective I use is to listen to her, be solid ground if she’s in a world of quick sand. IMO it depends on how much you know this person or your level of involvement and goals.
They definitely want to appear attractive and will seek strokes. They would bring your attention to subtle things about them or their behavior. They become very approval seeking and would do things they think you would like for them to do.

rokablu · 2020-10-01T22:57:22+00:00

In the art of seduction by robert greene part of the process is create a need. If the girl is seeking validation by explaining her past and you listen and don't try to mansplain and be there for her emotionally she can become dependent on that, however there are limits and in some situations it can back fire i suggest listening to the audio book version it will answer a lot of the questions you may have.

ElCuervoMiguel · 2020-10-01T23:01:24+00:00

Hi atticusishe.

Obvious answers are:

1) obviously not

2) apply Gibb's rulw#52(more or less): if you think she's looking for validation, then she's looking for validation:-)

More practically:

1)A conversation shall be a dialogue. This involves input and output in boths directions. If this is not happening, one of the two is using the other one.

Temporary suspension of disbelief is possible. How long? 1 date, no more.

2)Be generous. Always provide social validation, and observe the reaction.

Giving social validation makes you powerful.

If you feel she is "using you" to boast her ego, no problem. You have been generous: no reward expected.:-)

Title	Just random questions
Author	[deleted]
Upvotes	7
Comments	16
Date	October 1, 2020 9:24 PM UTC (5 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/j3hnfp/just_random_questions/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/just-random-questions.1503157 https://theredarchive.com/post/1503157

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