Though I know there's a handful of us out there actively crushing it and keep pushing themselves in the dating field, I also know that many of us have taken the back seat in pickup.

​

While this might be a temporary break from improving our experiences and stances in the dating arena of our lives, I absolutely believe that we do not become complacent and comfortable in other areas.

It was years ago that I heard about the three aspects of life and using that technique to cold read. The concept is that all major problems in your life can be compartmentalized to three key areas;

Health, Wealth, and Relationships.

The idea was to cold read using these three areas in order to build massive rapport with a girl.

The PUA, while attempting to comfort build would say

"I feel that you are having success in your relationships....but I get the sense that there's a problem in your career (Wealth) and direction in your life which is affecting your health."

(Or any combination of the three categories.)

​

This would build empathy with those around you no matter which variation that you do.

​

But I believe there's a sense of truth that comes from this concept. The idea was that if one aspect of your life; ie health, it would affect the others wealth/relationships and vice versa. (Wealth affected health/relationships; or even relationships affected wealth/health.)

​

And a fundamental truth can be derived from this concept. Think about it for a second. Almost every single problem will fall under these categories and whether or not one category of your life is put together or not; it will have a "bleeding effect" on the other aspects.

​

And this leads me to the conclusion of where you might be in life. Though I know that it may not make sense for some to cold approach at this time, I want you to think about the other aspects in your life that may be lacking; health and wealth.

​

Health

How healthy are you? I think health is a very important aspect that many of us really take for granted until it's too late.

"But Leionart, I work out 3-5 times daily, listen to spirituality and have goals/direction in my life."

One great observation that I have seen across the board (Myself included) is the need to replace coping mechanisms to more positive and healthier coping mechanisms.

I have seen it in everyone. Someone's doing great and things get hard and a bad day happens. Or maybe it's been multiple bad days or bad weeks/months/years in a row.

Then we use our coping mechanism to get through it; and when that mechanism is unhealthy, we take 2-3-4-5 steps back in our progress in our lives.

​

I think it takes a lot of courage to really examine what your own coping mechanisms are. If I took the projection of your entire life and charted it as a line going up for good days and down for bad days, one thing is inevitable; YOU WILL HAVE GOOD DAYS AND YOU WILL HAVE BAD DAYS. That will be constant from you entering this world to the day you exit. Well, if you know that bad days are inevitable, what can you do?

Some people grab cigarettes, go to the casino and gamble, eat excessively, grab a drink or ten, stay in bed for hours/days, go on shopping sprees, etc.

While this is may not seem like a big deal at this time, there are lasting effects of how you cope with the difficult times in your life.

I propose that you have the courage to really examine what your own coping mechanisms are and work towards making those just even a bit healthier.

Had a bad day? Why not hang out with friends instead of eating excessively? Why not try to grasp for a mile run instead of grasping that drink? Why not watch binge watch a tv show instead of getting a pack to go smoke?

​

Many of our own coping mechanisms may not be as extreme or necessarily bad for us. But I suggest we try to improve them with baby steps. Instead of grabbing a drink, why not go with a lesser coping mechanism like go grab a bite to eat? I think this is an area that a lot of us are not actively aware of; it takes a lot of introspection and honesty with ourselves.

​

Wealth

Getting a little too comfortable in your job/career or field? This is one that hits home. I see many coworkers staying in the same position/job with the same pay for years; not moving up or moving to a different job that pays more.

Complacency and being comfortable is the enemy of wealth. Though it was very uncomfortable actively seeking out a job to start and/or get your current position right now, have you become too comfortable? Can you see yourself in your job or position in the next 5 years without any upward movement in pay/position? Or can you see yourself in another field that you are either in a higher position or more passionate about?

I think this is an area that a lot of people fall into a trap. Sure, your coworkers are cool people, your leadership may be "chill". But you're not getting any younger. You're not progressing like you were. If you feel comfortable in this area of life, maybe it's time to reexamine your goals in wealth. Maybe you need to pick up those a few books and start learning how to invest? Maybe you've been renting for years and now it's time to save up for your own apartment/condo/house or even just move out? Maybe it's time to look at your spending habits and cut out unnecessary expenses? Maybe it's time to build something instead of working 9-5? Or maybe it's time to sacrifice the money and pursue something you're really passionate about?

​

In pickup we always talk about pushing your comfort zone: stay in set just a little bit longer, take just a little bit more risk, try something you're not used to.

​

This is the perfect time for you to examine your other aspects of life and really push the envelope. Start exercising, start applying for that new job, start looking at all the aspects of your life and ask yourself

"How can I push myself out of my comfort zone? How can I push this further?"

Let's start right now.