Making great progress, but I'm missing something.

Pit_Sweat · 2014-01-31T23:39:34+00:00

It would help to have some specific examples, but my hunch is that yes, you're probably taking some concepts too far.

There has to be balance: nice guys usually treat a girl like she's the center of his universe, which is why all this material teaches the opposite. But there exists the opposite end of the spectrum as well. You can definitely be too mean or make her feel too insignificant for her to want to stay with you.

I wouldn't worry too much though. This is usually a natural thing that happens to recovering nice guys. They overcompensate, go over into jerk territory, and often will swing back and forth between the two before they settle on the perfect medium.

EDIT: to be more clear, think of it this way. To get a relationship: you don't want her to see you as a guy who has no options and fixates on every girl in his life (nice guy). But you also don't want to be a guy who has so many options he doesn't care whether a girl stays or leaves and is all for himself (jerk). You want her to think you have plenty of options and aren't afraid to leave if she steps out of line, but at the same time you have a genuine interest in her and want to be with her.

NaturalNewbie · 2014-02-01T00:38:39+00:00

If you're looking to date a girl, or keep her in your life in some capacity, then you can't always be so apathetic to her or your feelings towards her. I am a strong believer in creating a "she needs you more than you need her" MINDSET, but that mindset is easy to establish, especially early on. Once she feels that way, further reminders will just make her feel insecure and unsure of your feelings for her. Be sweet, be nice, be romantic, just don't let her consume you.

HappyJerk · 2014-02-01T01:49:54+00:00

Dude girls are extremely sensitive and one "mean" comment will end things. If you neg, tease, or make any kind of negative joke it has to be completely clear it was a joke. Dont even try it unless you are 100 per cent sure she is on board. And some shit is just off limits. Her appearance, her life choices, her weight, rape, etc...

Here is a good way to figure out if you're being an asshole: use the "explain next day test." Imagine its the next day and she's describing the date to one of her friends. What will her friend think of what you did?

johannthegoatman · 2014-02-01T03:31:23+00:00

Being cocky/funny only alienated people in my experience.

Title	Making great progress, but I'm missing something.
Author	[deleted]
Upvotes	5
Comments	14
Date	January 31, 2014 10:58 PM UTC (12 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/1womhh/making_great_progress_but_im_missing_something/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/making-great-progress-but-im-missing-something.1309417 https://theredarchive.com/post/1309417

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