My biggest and most confusing lesson so far

diggingme · 2015-03-25T19:19:23+00:00

I posted this on an old account and people seemed to like it:

Plenty of posts here on seddit deal with there being no sexual chemistry between the OP, and the girl(s) he's speaking of. Complaints about:

Being put in the friend-zone.
Flakey Numbers (or facebook closes)
Approaches that never go anywhere
Dates that don't go anywhere

I believe all of these things are usually caused by the fact that there was no sexuality to the first or first few interactions between the guy and girl. Sexuality is extremely key. The interactions need to take on a different dynamics than just two friends chatting, other wise you are going to repeatedly wind up being just two friends chatting. ... Before you start trying to build up a playfully sexual vibe, your mind needs to be in the right place. You firstly need to have a deep confidence. Knowing that you're fine, and the awesome guy you are either way. This ties in with he notion that you also need to move away from outcome dependence. You're not carrying on with a fear of failure. You just do things because you feel you want to or should. This also needs to come from an honest and genuine place. Don't say or do stuff like this as a strategical move, but rather do it in the moment because you honestly want this hot girl. This should be cued by instinct, not strategy. ... So here are a few things I wind up doing that really set a sexual vibe up:

Eye fucking - Look her in the eyes. Imagine you're fucking her. One trick I've read here is to see your own reflection. Don't be this intense the whole time from the start without breaking, you need some pull and not a constant push. But use it often.
Get close - Stand close enough so that it would be uncomfortable for you if it was a guy. Invade her personal space gradually. Read her body language to know when to slow down and (literally) take a step back.
Compliment her - Be specific about what makes her attractive, and tell her honestly that you like it. Gauge the intensity to know how far to go. If I like her ass, and we're already really tense and seemingly up for it, I'll straight up tell her her ass looks good when she walks. If it's a more light hearted mood, maybe just tell her I like her jeans and she looks good.
Pausing - Slow down when you talk. Calm your voice so that it rests a bit deeper than before. Talk less too. Just give an "Mhmm" or a "ah, I see." in response sometimes. All while utilizing the eye contact I talked about before. It's almost like your mannerisms are saying "sure, I care what you have to say, but right now I think you're cute and I just want to kiss you, and when we get alone fuck your brains out.".
Leading Kino - Pull her out of the way, and closer to you of thing when walking or standing in a crowded area, keep your arm around her after that. Another one is throwing her legs over yours when sitting down.

Title	My biggest and most confusing lesson so far
Author	diggingme
Upvotes	8
Comments	3
Date	March 25, 2015 7:08 PM UTC (11 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/30a8lb/my_biggest_and_most_confusing_lesson_so_far/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/my-biggest-and-most-confusing-lesson-so-far.1385818 https://theredarchive.com/post/1385818

Comments