I suffered from truly crippling social anxiety for much of my life. I had a mortal fear of talking to ANYONE and this really determined the level of happiness and success I had in life. To be completely honest, I don't even know why I was so afraid of talking to people.
It took me a while to figure this out but now I talk to people all the time. I talk to strangers wherever I go and they love it. Here's my secret:
Just fucking do it
It sounds simple, I know. The truth is it really is simple. Just do it. Don't think about it, don't imagine how it will go, just do it. Not sure how? Here are a few tips:
Radiate positive energy when you first open. It really doesn't matter what you say, if you're energetic and positive then the law of state transference means that the other person will respond in kind. When I open people, men or women, my favorite line is "Hi! My name's Fox, nice to meet you." Then I shake their hand. Instant keno, instantly returned positive energy, instantly absorbed in my presence and interaction with them.
You're a boss. I know it. You know it. Now show it to them. The best way to project confidence is to be real and honest about it. Sure, you can fake it in the beginning but real confidence needs to be honest. Do things to increase your confidence. Dress better, work out like crazy, stay positive.
This should be the only real reason you open anyone. You do it because it's fun as hell and you love doing it. If you're having fun talking to someone then they will naturally have fun as well. Be funny, keep it light, be interesting, ask about their interests. One thing I had to realize is that people WANT you to come up and talk to them. They want someone interesting and exciting to come into their boring, mundane, repetitive lives. You're actually doing them a favor by opening and having a conversation with them!
Any relationship has a certain dynamic to it. Most of the time there will be an active, assertive person and a receptive, passive person. The natural masculine state is one of active, assertive leadership. The natural feminine state is passive, reactive and receptive. Not only should you approach every woman from the masculine state, you should do the same with men. This is what makes you Alpha. When you talk, you need to make confident, solid statements. Don't say something like:
"If you want, maybe you could come hang out with me and my friends?"
Do say something like:
"Come over to my table, you have to meet my friends."
The next time you're feeling some AA ask yourself why you want to open someone. Is it because you want to F, K or # close? That's why you're nervous. You're probably thinking something along the lines of "What if I open her and don't close? I would have failed. That would make me a failure." That's being outcome dependent. Just open them, have fun and do it for no other reason. Escalate if you want, keep an eye out for IOI and opportunity, but only do it because you enjoy it. Forget about the end result.
Conclusion
Trust me, if I can do this then you can too. I wasn't even Beta, I was Omega, people didn't even know I was there. Now I interact with people like a total boss. They love it and I have a hell of a lot of fun doing it. EVERYONE wants to meet that confident, fun, intelligent, attractive, out-going, adventurous person. EVERYONE wants that person in their life. Be that person!
Now get out there and dominate!
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