Need some advice on mixed signals.

PyouA · 2012-02-08T03:18:25+00:00

It could mean a lot of things. She is in your lab group, so it wouldn't be very political of her to blow you off for a number so she might just be giving to you with a do-not-call-me-to-go-out provision attached to it. Or maybe she doesn't want to seem easy or maybe she is unsure since you are being so wishy-washy, etc. You'll never know unless you ask her (which you shouldn't, unless you are really smooth).

In a lot of ways the damage is already done here, so let me give you some advice on how to handle this and any other prospective interests that derive in similar circumstances in the future.

First, if you are trying to interpret a bunch of signals from a girl as your sole source of information, then you are doing it wrong. The way stuff like this should progress is that you slowly keep pushing the bounds of your relationship and observe and listen to how she reacts. Going from lab partners that talk sometimes to asking for a number is a big jump that would freak any normally wired girl out.

How about just talking to her about a house party that you were at the other night and how (shitty/awesome/crazy) it was. Ask her what she did, if she did something cool, say something like, "wow, that sounds pretty awesome. I guess you know how to let loose on the weekends." if she did something lame say something like, "oh, just taking it easy this weekend or are you not much of a partier?" Fucking feel her out a bit. Then once you have established a dynamic (she is more fun than you and needs to take you out, you are more fun than her and needs to take you out, the girls she hangs out with are hot and she needs to take you out or she needs to bring them to your next party, or you both can't find anything to do that's fun consistently, whatever! it doesn't matter!) then start making plans according to that narrative.

This way you aren't some schmuck who thinks the girl should date him because she isn't a bitch to you in your science lab. You are just two people who talk a lot and think it'd be fun to hang out together. Be relaxed, it isn't a big deal. That should be enough to get you started, now once you are going to hang out you'll probably need another whole wall of text explaining that, but that's not in the cards for me right now.

tl;dr - Asking for her number to hang out is coming on a little strong, which could be good for some people, but only works if you are real confident. A better move for you is probably to escalate the conversational dynamic (quickly) to a narrative that involves the two of you outside of class - then push to hang out from there incrementally instead of just jumping to get her number ASAP.

lejamon · 2012-02-08T03:55:05+00:00

She has no idea either.

Therefore, assume attraction.

Seduceher · 2012-02-09T04:35:49+00:00

Get a sales job if you are afraid of being rejected.

I am just now realizing that getting a telemarketing sales job at 16 and getting yelled by strangers at was the greatest thing that ever happened to me.

If you cannot handle rejection, a sales job will fix you.

icantremembermyuser · 2012-02-08T19:35:58+00:00

over analyzing = you are doing it wrong.

here is what you need to set your mentality to

she already gave you her number she wants you she needs you she wont go out for a month = she wants you to come to her place and you'll stay in and fuck all day for a month.

Title	Need some advice on mixed signals.
Author	JackofTrades92
Upvotes	5
Comments	9
Date	February 8, 2012 2:36 AM UTC (14 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/pfn7g/need_some_advice_on_mixed_signals/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/need-some-advice-on-mixed-signals.1328058 https://theredarchive.com/post/1328058

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