Physical escalation anxiety?

NeedTheSpeed · 2017-11-09T16:45:03+00:00

Same boat, already hugged her a lot of brushing, legs touching but dunno how do I hold her hand or waist should I just do it? Overthinking it makes situation worse than it is I think.

I have beaten my anxiety to hug her when she came and I said "fuck it" in my mind and did it, I guess should do same with higher level escalation.

legodmanjames · 2017-11-09T20:15:04+00:00

the same way, you just do it until you become comfortable with it or she rejects you.

NoloRadio · 2017-11-09T23:37:37+00:00

I, too, still have trouble with this, but the one comment I want to make is that I tend to worry a lot less about it when I'm really connecting well with a girl. It comes surprisingly naturally when I'm having a great time. You may want to focus on conversational skills and making emotional connections instead of always worrying about the physical mechanics of escalating while you're on a date.

recyclablebanthas · 2017-11-10T13:28:06+00:00

Here's the thing, escalation doesn't start with some sort of creepy touch.

There are easy things that people overlook, which give you information about her openness to escalation with you.

Testing her space bubble. Edging into her personal space and seeing if she makes the adjustment to get her space back. Does she move her leg away from yours to maintain distance. And so on.
Safe, non-sexual touches that you could engage in with anyone, even guys. Arm jabs, shoulder, outside of the arm stuff, high fives, etc. Any sort of contact (or expectation of contact like when you put your hand up for a high five) will force a reaction from her as to how much she likes contact with you.
Her reaction to incidental or accidental contact. You can't plan this one, but sometimes you'll bump up against her or something, and her reaction might tell you something.
Overall, it's key that you pay attention throughout this process. You need to be aware of her reaction to you being in her space, or physical contact. It's the only way to know if you are welcome to do what you're doing, or if you should make adjustments.

Zoidberg22 · 2017-11-09T15:46:21+00:00

Hug them, arm touches

Gelcoluir · 2017-11-09T15:56:42+00:00

Seduction (and everything which gives you anxiety) is like the Game : if you think about it, you lose. So don't think about touching the girl, just do it !

dillpick15 · 2017-11-09T16:15:43+00:00

If you're going to tell them something, lightly tap them with the back of your hand/fingers on the shoulder; or physical humor that involves touching them like holding hands and skipping

FriedLizard · 2017-11-09T21:28:57+00:00

You don't start touching a girl until you get to know her. You might need to work on your verbal and body language skills first before you turn into a human octopus.

Title	Physical escalation anxiety?
Author	chad9k
Upvotes	7
Comments	15
Date	November 9, 2017 3:40 PM UTC (8 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/7bu2f7/physical_escalation_anxiety/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/physical-escalation-anxiety.1436611 https://theredarchive.com/post/1436611

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