I wasn't sure if this should be posted in here or socialskills, but a lot of people in here are naming this book, so I'll give it a shot.

I've been reading this book for a couple of days now I find that a general approach to things is that you should do things you want to do yourself and not do things to please others. The way I'm reading it, I should listen more to myself than I listen to others.

That's where the problem comes in. I've been struggling with social life for quite a bit, perhaps partly due to my suspected Asperger's, but probably also due to seeking validation a lot. What I'm thinking about though is that friends have pointed out things I'm not doing right and need to change. For example, a bit over a year back I was a lot more of a smartass than I am today. I thought I helped others by correcting them if they were wrong about things and making them smarter, but it turns out people felt challenged and threatened instead.

Now, if I only listened to what I wanted to do myself, I wouldn't have changed that and lost even more friends than I did. So I guess I'm really wondering how do you know when you should listen to other people's opinions and when should you ignore them?