Question about seduction and regrets.

puaCurveBall · 2015-09-30T17:56:50+00:00

As in, why did I waste my youth and best years (and best dating years) staying indoors, being an introvert, nerd, etc. when I could die any day and should have been out there enjoying life more.

Will you wake up at 41, wondering why you spent the last 5 years with regret and worrying about your past instead of staying present and focusing on the here and now?

Look... obviously there are plenty of guys in their 50's dating girls in their 20's, so its totally possible. If you want to ignore that because you haven't heard enough personal stories about it, then thats a big false limiting belief.

The basis of confidence is assuming you'll be successful.... so why are you assuming you are too old? Have you approached 100 women and they've all rejected you with the reason that you are too old? (guess what, they won't because its all in your head and that is barely a factor if they are enjoying time with you)

So basically, STOP FUCKING WORRYING ABOUT THE PAST. It doesn't fucking matter if you think you wasted the time, or if you think it was time well spent, or if you were having a bunch of threesomes or if you were stuck in a loveless relationship. That shit is the past and the sooner you stop fucking internalizing that shit as your identity, the better. Capiche?

Forget all the shit about your past and your age. Focus on the present. At the moment, you are just some dude that sucks at picking up women. This is a simple problem, and one PUA is specifically designed to fix.

So read the beginner books, read the sidebar, read the top posts. Get out of your head and go start approaching. Get better at talking to women, and learn to pull them to a date and sex. Build your skills.

Stop planning out your next 5-6 years and focus on TODAY. Right now, get the fuck out there and start approaching women.

letsgetrandy · 2015-09-29T21:19:56+00:00

I'm 39 and I have a steady course of mid-to-late 20s in my life. Just be in good shape, well-groomed, and have a good personality, and you'll be fine.

Don't dress in the younger fashions, because you'll look like a person who can't let their youth go. Dress your age, and the younger gals will be anxious to be around someone "more sophisticated than guys my age," etc. Don't have a beard -- seriously, that's for the kids. And absolutely get your ass into the gym if you aren't already. I mean it.

But don't rule out those early 30s gals, because they're often much more fun when the lights go out. Chicks in their 30s don't always do all the things you can get 20-somethings to do, but what they do do, they do way better.

Squand · 2015-09-29T21:24:24+00:00

Fetishizing age is the wrong way to go about this.

You didn't waste your dating years, you chose to do other things.

Start keeping track of your day. Make goals. Learn to focus on the process. Instead of "regret" focus on change.

Reframe, I wish I would have... To, I look forward to...

Regret can be a helpful emotion to feel, but use it to make positive changes in your behavior.

On some level...if you're feeling really low about girls, try this perspective: Like dude, sure you could have been with more chicks... But you also could have dedicated your life to science, won a nobel and saved countless lives... How often do you regret that choice?

We could all be more effective people. We all make choices on what to focus on, and we can change those things too.

Title	Question about seduction and regrets.
Author	cz812
Upvotes	0
Comments	8
Date	September 29, 2015 8:16 PM UTC (10 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/3mvkpg/question_about_seduction_and_regrets/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/question-about-seduction-and-regrets.1395081 https://theredarchive.com/post/1395081

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