[QUESTION] How to keep conversation going forever

Zack_Fair_ · 2014-08-07T16:13:04+00:00

your anxiety is getting in the way. for results much more wide-reaching than just becoming a better conversationalist, you need to get rid of that first and foremost. now I'm not a psychiatrist, but I always recommend exposure-therapy.

keeping finding things to say is actually not that difficult, because it's an integral part of how the human brain is hardwired. your mind makes associations whenever it gets even a sliver of input. you verbalize those and you are conversating. you get info back and you're good ad infinitum .
problem is, today there are some common inhibitors to this simple system, notably (in your case:) anxiety, nervousness, panic, overthinking. you're a deer in headlights.

when you can overcome what's limiting you, you'll be able to relax and let your brain do its job.

joshsway · 2014-08-07T14:05:46+00:00

Good conversation isn't just about small talk, it's about actually having things to talk about. One technique you can use though is the concept of "Identity Statements" My partner TVJ wrote about this in detail here: https://www.joshsway.com/articles/view/the-secret-to-small-talk-identity-statements

This is a key way to turn small talk into engaging conversation.

poems_4_you · 2014-08-07T16:54:57+00:00

My best advice to you is ask questions

There isn't a person in the world, guy or girl, who doesn't like talking about themselves when you seem genuinely interested. As a precursor you might consider putting in the effort to learn about some her very basic interests so that you can educate yourself a little on the topics (thus being able to ask intelligent questions), but even then it's not necessary.

But they must be questions that advance the conversation, so keep that in mind. Not just 'how are you' etc.

If you ask what she's been up to this summer and she tells you about how she decided to pick up kayaking or whatever, ask her what about kayaking appeals to her, where are her favorite spots i.e. things that advance the conversation. Best of luck.

readonlyuser · 2014-08-08T15:57:16+00:00

You have a filter in your mind of conversation. You determine subconsciously through your mood, context, subconscious and other factors, where it is set. You need to lower the filter. Talking about pretty much anything is OK, even bowel movements, getting boners, monster truck racing, etc. As long as you start talking and keep her engaged, it's pretty much all gravy.

There are things that will help along the way, like well-phrased questions, teasing, threading, stories, games, etc., but they will only help. You're the one who needs to keep the conversation going (especially at the beginning), and sometimes that just means sharing more than you're used to.

Title	[QUESTION] How to keep conversation going forever
Author	[deleted]
Upvotes	4
Comments	5
Date	August 7, 2014 1:33 PM UTC (12 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/2cvrdl/question_how_to_keep_conversation_going_forever/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/question-how-to-keep-conversation-going-forever.1374736 https://theredarchive.com/post/1374736

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